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    Momojr's Avatar
    Momojr Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 9, 2014, 08:23 PM
    Does she hate me ?
    I met this girl online and I fell in love with. She told me she's been raped before and when I finally met her we were holding hands and I mentioned how my friend beat me in this video game. I said he raped me in the game and she let go of my hand she looked a little sad, but I didn't think of it much the rest of the date goes normal. The next day I text her I love you she says yeah you too, and every time I said it, she said yeah you too. I told her I'm sorry for what I said. She said it was OK. I noticed she got a little sad, but it doesn't bother me at all, but she changed her kik name from Mohamed ❤️ to some song lyric. I even asked her to say I love you instead of you too, she said OK, I love you, but when I told her goodnight, I love you, she said OK goodnight.

    I am feeling so insecure like she doesn't care about me anymore. By the way this is my first ever relationship.
    odinn7's Avatar
    odinn7 Posts: 7,691, Reputation: 1547
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    #2

    Apr 9, 2014, 08:28 PM
    Your insensitivity to what this girl went through probably showed her more about you and how you think than she really wanted to know. Overall, that was a pretty crass and insensitive thing to say to her...comparing getting beaten in a video game to a real life rape...whether that was your intention or not, I'm sure that is how it came across to her. You'll be lucky if it lasts at all.
    Momojr's Avatar
    Momojr Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Apr 9, 2014, 08:36 PM
    Yeah I know I didn't realize it at the time I feel so bad I'm in love with I never had a girlfriend or anything like one and I couldn't imagine life without her and the rest of the date went smooth like she didn't noticed she told me it's fine and I just can't lose her no matter what she told me that she'll always love me and all she wants is too be with me forever
    odinn7's Avatar
    odinn7 Posts: 7,691, Reputation: 1547
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    #4

    Apr 9, 2014, 08:43 PM
    So this was the first and only time you ever met in person? Maybe she realized, after meeting you, that you just aren't what she was picturing....or maybe you are pushing the "I love you" thing too much and too soon. You know, if you say it too soon, it comes off as desperate and needy...maybe a little creepy as well. Now you are forcing her to say it just to appease you. I have to say, if you step back and look at this...you're making mistakes all over.
    Momojr's Avatar
    Momojr Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Apr 9, 2014, 08:44 PM
    I guess your right and she was the one who said I love you first

    She told me that I'm not leaving and that it's OK thanks for you opinion but in going to believe her because there's no one else I rather be with
    odinn7's Avatar
    odinn7 Posts: 7,691, Reputation: 1547
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    #6

    Apr 9, 2014, 08:58 PM
    That's great and I hope it works out for you....but just remember, you're the one that came here asking.

    I will say that you're going to want to treat her a little differently though...but that's up to you. I mean, she said she's not leaving and wants to be with you forever so that's that, right? Since she said it, it will surely happen....
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #7

    Apr 10, 2014, 06:36 AM
    Stop pushing her to appease your own insecurities with making her say she loves you. Selfish thoughts and actions will drive people away, and not being sensitive to her will surely make her not want to keep this relationship. That's probably what you are doing on many levels.

    Show some gratitude and some understanding of her attentions before she realize you are an insensitive boob who only thinks of himself and his needs. That is what YOU have shown her so far, and why she still hangs in there with you is a mystery.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #8

    Apr 10, 2014, 11:01 AM
    You guys have not really known each other well enough for love. How old are you?
    I think what you said was tacky and very immature and maybe she does not love you but thinks she can't do any better. You two need to back off the love talk, stop being so needy and get to know each other.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
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    #9

    Apr 10, 2014, 11:06 AM
    I agree with everyone... you actually met her once... no possible way are you in love with each other...

    In lust mabe... certainly not love... I don't even see a healthy friendship here... just two needy people acting desperate.

    Sorry if that's a bit blunt... but the first thing that entered my mind when I read this was... good lord not another of these... so I held back and waited... read it again... and decided... yeah... it IS another one of those.

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