[Crisp3e]

I'm at a bit of a dilemma as I've only ever had straight sex but now at 30 I keep thinking about having sex with men. I have been thinking about it for a while now and have been talking to an older guy who is willing to help out but can't go through with it because of all the horror stories you hear about diseases etc (he did say everything we do will be safe) and just the taboo that hangs over it. I know it is more out in the open than it uses to be but I don't know how to go about it.
Any help on the subject is appreciated

[joypulv]

No one can tell you to have sex with another man or not. I'd suggest that you read for several days about HIV and AIDS. Then the 'horror stories' can give way to facts. And as many heterosexuals do, you can ask to see recent blood tests in the original, or even go for a brand new test with the person you first have sex with. Your reading online will tell you all about transmission and protection. It would take too long here, and there's no need to invent the wheel.

As for taboo and emotional dilemmas, only you can answer that. Perhaps the older man would be willing to take you places, invite other gay men over for dinners or out to restaurants and events, with the understanding that you still don't want sex yet.

[Alty]

This isn't a decision anyone can make for you. If you need to ask strangers online, I feel you're not ready for any of it.

Obviously something is holding you back, warning bells are ringing. So why would you ask anyone online to make the decision for you?

This is all on you. Do or don't. If it's something you want to try, and this older guy is making you nervous enough to go online for advice from people you don't even know, I'd say that's a pretty good reason not to go for it with this guy.

If it's something you still want to explore, I'd wait and find someone in person, someone that doesn't make you nervous enough to go online for answers, to do what you obviously want to do. Condoms! Background info on the guy. Don't just do it for the experience. Anything worth having in life, isn't just about a few seconds of gratification. A few seconds can lead to a lifetime of pain, even death. It's not something to just dive into.

That's my advice.

[Fr_Chuck]

I will agree, the "horror" stories can happen with anyone, straight or gay when you have sex with a new partner, The only time sex is safe, is when it is with a long term partner who both are faithful.

Sex with a new partner, male or female may lead to many STD, including the Aids virus.
That is why as noted, asking for and seeing results of a new test, always using proper protection (condom)

The biggest issue is that you are having doubts. It is one thing to think about, and another to do. Would you have doubts of having sex with a women ? Do you desire men, not just think about it, but really desire it ?

[talaniman]

Finding a willing partner is easy, but the right one takes time to know, trust, and get comfortable with. You date until you are ready and have trust and communications with your choice. If Its not right in your mind, body, and soul, don't do it.