[anurbangentleman]

Me and my girlfriend of two years have recently split up and I can't stop thinking about how to get her back. I don't want her to leave for good because she means more to me than anything and I know that we could make things work.

Our relationship wasn't the most perfect one we had our times in which we argued, but they weren't things worth breaking up over. I was there for her whenever she needed me and helped her with anything that she could ever ask for. Things were perfect until I started getting more busy with school and work. I tried dedicating whatever time I could to her but I would sometimes forget to do things she asked me to do and that made her feel bad and as I started becoming more busy with school and work she started feeling like this wasn't working. And then a week after our two year anniversary she drops the bomb on me that she isn't happy and doesn't want it anymore. What can I do to make her see that things can work, that I never tried to leave her in the dark and that the only reason I was so busy was because I'm trying to do my best in what I have to do for the benefit of us in the future. I've tried talking to her but she is very much convinced that its over and I don't know what to do. I don't want her to go and she knows it.

[chuff]

You've got to back away and make her miss you. Leave her alone for now and see if she misses you. Don't plan on her returning though. But if you keep making yourself available she's going to push you away even more.

[diya]

[QUOTE=chuff]You've got to back away and make her miss you. Leave her alone for now and see if she misses you. Don't plan on her returning though. But if you keep making yourself available she's going to push you away even more.[/QUOTE ]

Chuff.. I agree with you partially but you know sometimes this strategy leads to gaps in communication and as you would know communication is the key to healthy relationships. What you say is right... but this step should not be exaggerated to the extent that it leads to many days of non communication and which will inevitably lead to "already moved on" syndrome... very dicey situation though...

[mckenzie134]

Break is good but I also agree sometimes some communication is healthy.

[talaniman]

You've tried talking, didn't work.
Leave her alone, to let the emotional dust settle, and for you both to have time to think. After two years, she should know how important work and school are to your future, and you should know how important your free time is to her. Always remember that. Give it 2 or 3 weeks and then see how she feels. Don't have expectations of renewing this relationship, but see if she is at least willing to talk about it. Seems as if you would have had a clue she wasn't happy, and it must have been for a while, because I doubt she just woke up and decided she wants out. HMMMM!

[imissher]

It's difficult when a girl loses interest in you over a period. Causing her to act on it.. out of the blue, as in your case. The only way I see this possibly working, is if you give her time by herself to think about what she has lost. Let her miss you... and after a reasonable amount of time, talk to her. But prepare for the worst.

[anurbangentleman]

I want to thank you guys for your answers and knowledge, right now it's very much appreciated.

[Geoffersonairplane]

I ditto Chuff's and tal's response... Leave her alone, see if she misses you.

If not, begin a journey of healing and moving on.

My ex has not come back after 7 1/2 months nor do I now expect that to happen. In my opinion (and others around me) I was a kind, caring, sincere guy but she wanted something different (maybe the opposite of me :rolleyes: ), the single life, an opportunity to explore, perhaps date others, find herself...

I was probably not the one for her and her for me, even though at the time I wanted to believe otherwise.

Letting go is hard but very possible once the emotional pain fades.