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Advice20 · Dec 19, 2013, 11:48 AM

There's been a problem. My dad before I was born. My mom tried to put him on the birth cert. but since he was already dead they couldn't allow it. Ok so my mom goes to apply for survivor benefits. They deny her because she doesn't have a birth cert. or any paper saying that he was my dad. Since she didn't have a birth cert. she was asked to give a written letter of my dad acknowledging he was my dad. She had none of that. He was alive four months after my conception so he died early in her pregnancy. They had broken up there wasn't much communication between them. So she applied every now and then and always was denied she had nothing claiming him as mine. So I'm wondering how I can change my birth cert. to show that I am his daughter? By DNA test? If so how can I get something from his remains to prove he's my dad? Could I use a close relative? Also how close? And if that worked could I possibly get survivor benefits now? I'm under 22 and a full time student so wouldn't I be eligible? I feel stupid to be doing this but seriously I'm a struggling student working and going to school full time it would really help out to have a little extra. Is this possible? What would the correct steps to take first if this is possible?

stinawords · Dec 19, 2013, 12:12 PM

First what state are you in? Second, there are ways to use his other relative DNA to link him to you. However if they don't do so on their own free will it would take a court order. Having waited this long I'm not sure a court would give that order. Being that your mother has already applied several times I would say your best bet is to call a couple orders in your area. Sometimes I give cheap or free consultations and then you would know better if they would be able to help you at all.

Advice20 · Dec 19, 2013, 12:19 PM

Originally Posted by stinawords

First what state are you in? Second, there are ways to use his other relative DNA to link him to you. However if they don't do so on their own free will it would take a court order. Having waited this long I'm not sure a court would give that order. Being that your mother has already applied several times I would say your best bet is to call a couple orders in your area. Sometimes I give cheap or free consultations and then you would know better if they would be able to help you at all.

Well I was in Michigan I'm now in Nevada. I didn't have any control over the situation until turning 18 I thought it was over since I was 18. But I recently read that I could actually be eligible.

I don't know if they'd willingly do it or not. I know a few of them on Facebook. My mom didn't want anything to do with them because she thought they were bad influences. My dad also doesn't have any full siblings. But he has a living mom and dad. His dad seemed nice but I've never even met him in person or anything. It would a be a little odd to ask since I'm so old now.

Advice20 · Dec 19, 2013, 12:20 PM

Ok I have one other question what's an order?

ScottGem · Dec 19, 2013, 12:46 PM

An order from a court to compel DNA testing.

Your mother could have and should have tried to establish a familial connection by having the DNA of a close relative tested. That could have established paternity. By not doing that, I don't know if it is too late to do so.

First thing would be to locate a close relative. Sibling, other child or parent. See if they are willing to submit to testing.

Advice20 · Dec 19, 2013, 02:11 PM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

An order from a court to compel DNA testing.

Your mother could have and should have tried to establish a familial connection by having the DNA of a close relative tested. That could have established paternity. By not doing that, I don't know if it is too late to do so.

First thing would be to locate a close relative. Sibling, other child or parent. See if they are willing to submit to testing.

My brother isn't confirmed to be his dad either. Doesn't even look like him. His siblings are half siblings. His parents would be the only options.

stinawords · Dec 19, 2013, 02:37 PM

If his parents for the only option then that is who you would have to get in contact with. But as I said earlier, you should still talk to a lawyer or two that deal with this on a regular basis. They could tell you if you would be wasting money getting DNA tests done if you wouldn't qualify even if proven to be his child. If that was the only thing stopping you from receiving benefits all the times your mother applied for you, you might still stand a chance. However, if there were other factors as well, even after being proven to be his child you still may not qualify. I'm not trying to be a downer, just want you to be prepared.

Advice20 · Dec 19, 2013, 04:10 PM

Back in the day the problem was her not having a paper that stated he was my dad in some form.

I just read how most people in this situation fix the birth cert and then proceed I guess that's what I'm to do.