[Maxwell15]

Hello.
I and my girlfriend have been happily dating for 2+ months and now she's ignoring me. The difficult thing is that we're far from each other, met online and never met in person. We talked on phone and texted each other.

Two weeks ago I started to find the way she treats me kind of complicated. She didn't want to talk on phone, to act intimately (I mean avoided my "kisses" and so on) and was responding to my messages lazily. She was insisting on being busy with studying. When I wanted to find out what might be wrong with her, she said, "I'm ok."

I'm not a calm person, so I kept asking her about it, I even got a positive answer to "Do you love me?", but finally she got mad. I told her that she doesn't care about our relationship as much as I do when she was already offline. She's read (or just opened without reading) the last message and never responded. She hasn't been online for 2 days after that, so she hasn't seen yet my message where I'm promising that it won't ever happen again. I don't have any other options to talk to her.

I'm wondering what I should do in this situation and would be glad for any help.

[Homegirl 50]

She has been your online girl friend for 2 months?
Maybe it has gotten old and tiring and she is ready to move on.
Leave her alone. It doesn't appear she wants to talk to you anymore.
You may have taken this a bit too serious.

[Maxwell15]

Why wouldn't she tell me that then? Once she broke up with me, and she let me know. What's the point of not appearing online? She may just not answer to me, why would she be avoiding other people from her contact list? I'm not that horrible.
I'm sorry if asking further questions is against the rules.

[Cat1864]

May I ask how old you both are?

If she doesn't want to be in contact then you leave her alone and go about your own life. She may contact you when she is ready. But don't sit around waiting for her.

Now, I will explain why I gave the advice I just did.

You don't know her. You know who she appears to be on-line. You are rushing from just meeting to declarations of love way too quickly. Two months is barely beginning to scratch the surface of who someone is when you meet face-to-face every day. Only knowing each other through on-line communications means that you have no idea of who each other really is.

You seem to have very unrealistic expectations of how and when she returns your messages. Some people are very reserved even in written communications and wait to know someone better until they share any type of intimacy. She has a life outside of your relationship and it will affect when she can communicate with you. If you consider it lazy if she takes time to respond and accuse her of not caring plus any other accusations you made, she may be deciding you aren't worth the drama.

This is a lesson for the future. Control your temper and your words. You need to understand that apologies are well and good but they do not undo the damage the actions did. You can try to put a broken cup back together but it is still damaged. You can say it won't happen again all you want, however, that is a phrase that is said way too often just before it happens again. For this female, the blow-up happened before she really knows you and your temperament (Like you only know the person she acts like on-line, she only knows the person you have appeared to be.) She has very little experience to tell her if you mean what you say and can control yourself in the future.

Go about your life and if she contacts you make decisions based on where you are at that point.

[talaniman]

She wants nothing to do with you and her actions speak louder than words can so take it for what it is and leave her ALONE.

She doesn't want to answer your questions or respond to you, and you can't make her. Stop trying. Only she knows why she no longer likes you, and she ain't telling.

[Maxwell15]

Well, thanks you both for the answers.

I'm 20 and she's 18. I have never been in any relationship.

I can't be sure that I don't know her, maybe you're right and the things I knew and assumed weren't enough. I wouldn't say she was reserved, actually, it was her who felt in 'love' first.

I see. The whole thing is about me and my impatience.

talaniman, thanks. Seems that I'll come here again soon with a question on dealing with a bad break-up. :D

[animals1433]

Well it depends on how much you love her but if she is ignoring you she might be losing interest in you and if she is you need to get her back to you so you need to get her a gift and show her how much you truly love her. Good luck!!

[odinn7]

No, don't get her a gift, that's stupid.

2 months only online and, if I read this right, you broke up once already in that 2 months. It's not worth it. Move on. You'll find someone else.