[BLAZON]

I have been quite confused for nearly the past two weeks.

I have been in love with this girl since about Feb or March. And like the last time I was in love with a girl, my ability to not be nervous when talking to the girl became difficult ever since I realized my feelings for her. Unfortunately, this has caused me to be unable to ask her out to a semi-formal dance our school held after she had finally return from her 3-month exchange. And then, after exams, I failed at any chance I'd have to ask her out. And then, another chance I could have had was when I saw her (with her exchange student) at registration (she was helping her e.s. get registered), and just seeing her surprised me so much, and I, again, didn't take any chance to ask her out, or even to make conversation with them. After that, the only way I had been keeping contact with her was through Facebook messaging, although I had seen her e.s. and mother (who's a teacher at my school) around a few times. And then, on the first Oct, I had done this before once or twice, I wished a happy first of Oct. And right when I had attempted to send her another message that night, it was indicated that her account blocked communication with mine. She had told me before that she worked night shifts at a job, and it said so on her profile page as well. For the past 2 months, the only way I find I could contact her again is finding her mother and starting up a conversation (and somewhere bring up Michaela--'how she's doing' and stuff like that), her e.s. possibly through Skype (I'm not sure, but I think I may have found her Skype profile), and using an alternative account on Facebook. Only thing is, if she did intentionally block me (not a wrong button or Fb glitch, etc.), I don't want to disrespect her wishes. Where I come from with the stuff about Facebook glitching is that I had been blocked by another friend on Facebook before, and when I asked him in person about it, and he didn't know that he blocked me (we're good friends, so no, he's not lying).

And then, 12 days ago, we were doing CPR/First Aid/AED training. Honestly, I felt like I kind of liked her again, when I saw this other girl I've known since grade 9 end up being in the same 2-day class as me. And then, it finally came, when we were practising doing CPR procedures on their dummies, in which the teacher had put us with partners based on our seating arrangement, and, what do I know, the girl and I got to be partners for the exercise. When we got to the CPR practise on the dummies, it was like a dream of mine came true, getting to work with this girl. We helped each other out by CPRing our dummies. Next thing I know, now we got to position our partners into the recovery position. And again, wow! After that, she complimented me on how apparently well I did, and on our way back, I thanked her for the help. For those two days, I felt like I got to do what I could never before--fall in love with her. I know this was just CPR training and everything, but it came over me that day--I was in love with this other girl.

I also had had dreams about both girls. I think my dream about the first girl was maybe somewhat romantic, more friendly, in my opinion. But we were hanging out at her place and having a good time. But my dream about the other girl... we were actually 'together'. She wore the exact coat she actually has. And we even kissed (sorry to those who don't like that description).

To this day, after all that, I've been so confused. I've been in love with the first girl for so long. She was kind to me in high school, and really just everything. I still feel like and want to think she is the one for me. But after CPR training, I've also now had feelings for the other girl, whom I've known longer, and all that stuff. She even had asked me if she could be my groupie (because I've done electronic music production)--which when I looked up the definition, found the part of it that was about 'sexual intimacy'.

But anyhow, I thought I'd come back and see what help/advice I could get from you guys. I do have plans, but I'm not sure how they'll work, or if they will.

Thanks!

[Homegirl 50]

How old are you? I think you just have a crush on them both. You don't even know if the first girl blocked you. If she did you need to leave her alone. Relax and see how things go with the second one.

[BLAZON]

That's the thing, I don't know if she blocked me, and I fear being intrusive in finding out if she did. And I am in my older teens--I just am not as talented with dealing with my feelings for girls as I ever used to be. Probably because the girls who I actually revealed that I had crushed on them was really just because they were cute, as now I've actually opened my mind to how great they are on the 'inside'.

[Homegirl 50]

Then you need to find out before you go any further with her. This is an opportunity to talk to her

[joypulv]

Groupies started in the 60s as girls who followed bands around and were willing to have sex with them, but it has come to mean anyone who really likes a certain talent or skill. When a girl you like goes out of her way to give you a compliment, show your appreciation, even if it's just 'gee wow I had no idea.'

As for blocking you on Facebook, she might have blocked everyone. I find the interruption annoying, unless it's for something specific about plans. When people message me 'how are you' I tell them I don't do chat. Which is true. But it doesn't mean I don't like them. I haven't blocked anyone - not yet.

Now about your shyness: it's time to learn how to overcome it with more overtures. If you like someone enough, you endure the fear. You write down pages of friendly things to say, and compliments such as 'your hair looks really pretty that way,' and little questions such as 'how do you think you did on that exam.' Then you study them so that any of them can be said easily.

I'm an old woman now, but I assure you, plenty of us like shy men. I fell for it in a big way!

[Fr_Chuck]

Agree, you have no idea and this is not "love" you need to slow down and just talk in real life to these people

[talaniman]

Those young females always have a knack of making young males feel all sorts of intense feelings and the real test is to gain confidence from experience to best learn how to deal with your own feelings.

An exercise to overcome your shyness, or lack of confidence or more simply your lack of experience is to say hi with a smile to all your classmates everyday. Pay attention to them, and not your shortcomings. Most of them are going through the same thing on some level, and being friendly and approachable is attractive. Don't think love when you get those strong feelings, think FRIEND, and act accordingly.

Wondering how to find out if someone feels about you as you do about them is but a scary distraction. Just treat others, especially girls as you want to be treated.

[BLAZON]

I think I saw the first girl today when she had just driven into her driveway at her house. I was walking down the street as I usually do. But I didn't speak with her--thing is I wouldn't want to seem like a creep, especially with that I know she lives there (then again, I'm not sure she knows that I know that, but I know from seeing her or her mother go there).
I am thinking next time just say hi, and have a conversation if I can. But I guess my point is to why I am not sure about doing some of these things to get back in contact with her is because I don't want to seem like a creep or any of that to her. For all I know it's my mind bugging me since I've had inexperience with this stuff.

[BLAZON]

Homegirl 50: Then you need to find out before you go any further with her. This is an opportunity to talk to her

What did you mean by that, exactly?

[talaniman]

It means initiate a conversation.

[BLAZON]

But the problem with that is that her account has blocked me on Facebook, and the only ways are to make/use an alternative Facebook account, ask her mother (who teaches at my school) if I see her around, ask one of her friends at my school, see if I can phone her, drop by her house, or even email her Facebook. But the only other thing is I don't want to invade her privacy, especially if she did intend to block me.
Something else I've thought about is (although she does keep busy, so maybe not) that, since the first of Oct, we haven't conversed. And that if she had not intended to block me, if she might (have) ever wonder(ed) why I haven't tried to chat with her in so long.

[talaniman]

This is way too much head drama my friend, and if you are afraid to take an extra step, to find the facts of the matter, then you walk away and drop the whole line of thinking that involves her.

Never stoop to deception, on Facebook or anything else. Make contact, or walk away. Take her moms suggestions if it's that important, and you are blocked on face book.

[Homegirl 50]

If she has not talked to you since the first of October, she probably is not thinking about you.
This way too much drama. Call her and ask her what's up or move on.

[BLAZON]

Do you really think that would be appropriate to do? As in call her?

[talaniman]

If you have her number, why NOT?

[BLAZON]

I'd have to look it up in the phone book first.

[talaniman]

Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.

Good Luck.

[BLAZON]

So this is appropriate, contacting her with her phone number that I looked up (it's the right one).

[Homegirl 50]

It's the only way you are going to know where you stand, put an end to this drama .