Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    jackeus's Avatar
    jackeus Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Nov 16, 2013, 02:03 PM
    I have issues of stealing and lying and don't know how to stop?
    About 4 years ago I was hanging out with my BFF and we were at the mall 1 night and we were going into a store and my friend really wanted this nice cap but the sad thing was it costs $75.00 and all he had was $65.00 so he was really mad so when we were leaving the store the alarm went off and I thought that we never got anything but sure enough he had the cap inside his jacket and he was arrested. And ever since he did that I thought that I might get away with it so I had started to steal money from my parents, grandparents, cousins, siblings, and neighbors and then lying about it so that I don't get caught
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
    current pert
     
    #2

    Nov 16, 2013, 03:55 PM
    You do know how to stop, because it's as easy as not doing it.
    You don't know how to convince yourself that you want to stop, and that you must, before someone gets hurt - someone else. All those people are suspecting someone, and if you are good at lying, then they are suspecting someone who isn't! And that person doesn't deserve this, does he or she?
    Can you see that your starting this out with your friend stealing is really lame?
    Can you realize how the stealing moves on down the line, and will eventually hurt someone, if you don't stop, AND confess? What if a cleaning woman is deported back to Mexico? What if a younger cousin is accused and goes off and overdoses on a drug out of the unfairness of it all? I'm not being over dramatic - such things happen.

    Do you want to stop, no excuses?
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
    Pets Expert
     
    #3

    Nov 16, 2013, 04:02 PM
    You can't stop stealing? Seriously? I think you want attention, that's why you posted this thread, or you're a troll and want people to get upset, because you have nothing else to fill your time.

    If this story is true, simply stop stealing. It's not hard. You see something you want, you pay for it with money you earned. You respect your family, and friends, and stop stealing from them. You start respecting yourself enough to stop doing immoral things. It's really not hard.

    Seriously, get a life! A real life! Just because you want something, doesn't mean you have a right to take it from someone else. Earn it, like all decent people have to do!
    ma0641's Avatar
    ma0641 Posts: 15,675, Reputation: 1012
    Uber Member
     
    #4

    Nov 16, 2013, 09:24 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by alty View Post
    you can't stop stealing? Seriously? I think you want attention, that's why you posted this thread, or you're a troll and want people to get upset, because you have nothing else to fill your time.

    If this story is true, simply stop stealing. It's not hard. You see something you want, you pay for it with money you earned. You respect your family, and friends, and stop stealing from them. You start respecting yourself enough to stop doing immoral things. It's really not hard.

    Seriously, get a life! A real life! Just because you want something, doesn't mean you have a right to take it from someone else. Earn it, like all decent people have to do!
    brava!
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #5

    Nov 17, 2013, 06:50 AM
    So, when your friend shoplifted a cap, and got caught, 4 years ago, you say that because of what he did, you started to steal.

    That doesn't make sense.

    The only thing that makes sense is you posted it under 'mental health' so I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you realize your compulsion to steal, is something you may not be able to control.

    You say you have issues with stealing and lying and don't know how to stop. I assume the lying has something to do with the people you are stealing with- they've likely questioned you, and you lied to cover it up.

    I don't think you've yet had any serious consequences for your stealing. I also assume that the money you have stolen from others, isn't the real issue.

    The compulsion, or need to steal, and hide the activity, is not unlike someone who has a gambling problem. A big part of the 'game' is all the activity that leads up to the actual 'event'. Thinking about it, planning it; this type of thinking is exciting and when it happens, and you pull it off, you're okay for a while, then the need comes on again, and you find yourself back in the same predictable routine.

    It is a matter of addiction and along with any addiction, comes the errors in thinking that justifies the behavior.

    Knowing it's wrong isn't enough to stop, feeling really badly after the fact, isn't enough to stop, the accusations coming your way and the stories of denial and the problems created within your family, isn't enough to stop.

    I think you should seek counseling, particularly with a cognitive behavioural therapist. This type of counseling will identify and deal with the thinking that comes into play that, at the moment, you may not have any control over. You'll learn to identify the triggers, and learn how to think in a way that you can realize what is happening, and also learn the skills you need, to stop yourself.

    Before this goes any further, and you end up in jail, seriously think of giving therapy a try.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

Lying and Stealing [ 3 Answers ]

I am 16 years old and I have been caught stealing three times now. I have straight a's and have never been in any trouble around town. I am very well known for all the good things I do around our small town. However, my mom never seems to appreciate what I do in school or out of school. I was...

Lying and stealing [ 5 Answers ]

I have a 12 year old son that constantly lies and steals from his parents. We have tried many ways to stop this behavior but he just continues. Is there and help for this type of problem? There has been two occasions where he stayed over at someone's house and items got missing and we believe...

I have issues lying and stealing and my parents don't trust me now. [ 7 Answers ]

I have had a lot of trouble ying and stealing lately... I have been caught twice and I am addicted to lying, I just can't seem to stop. Does anyone know how to stop this?? I have such a hard time resisting the urge to lie or steal and can't seem to break the habit even though I really want to....


View more questions Search