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    Sassyocgrl's Avatar
    Sassyocgrl Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Sep 18, 2013, 05:50 AM
    Does he confuse needing me with loving me?
    I have been with my BF for over five years and we never do anything or go anywhere. When we first met he was a home body. I thought that it was because he had never been with someone who like going and doing things. Well he will get home from work and stay in his room playing xbox all weekend. He makes excuses as to why he don't want to do anything like he is tired or he doesn't have money but that is really a lie.

    Then the sex thing was good of course at first then it went to him wanting to watch porn and have me dress up and stuff. It was fun at first but it seemed like it was all about him. He can't have a romantic time with me without the porn going. Now it seems like we never have sex anymore so I know he is getting off his normal way. It seems like he would rather have the sex time by himself then with me. That's odd to me! Then when I try to talk to him about it he says stuff like" Why don't I ruin it by mentioning how I feel". Or we are having sex, how more intimate do I need it?

    Needless to say I tried to break up and he just acts like nothing was never said. Even in arguments where he is wrong he will never apologize for anything. He just acts like nothing never happened. I really don't know what kind of relationship this is and Im certainly at a point that he needs to start doing some changing or I'm gone!

    Is this normal? Is he in a comfortable stage and doesn't want to change? Im not sure? Help??
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Sep 18, 2013, 06:01 AM
    He is manipulating things to all about him. He will not listen to how you feel and when you do tell him he will twist it to make you the bad guy. I have seen it happen so many times. All you can do is live with things as they are or leave him. Your only other option is counseling but I am sure he won't go for that because he would see it as 'why fix what ain't broke'.
    Many guys think having a mother figure to do for them is love. The more you do for me the more I know you love me. Its all about them. Not all guys are like that but there are many that are.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #3

    Sep 18, 2013, 06:51 PM
    I like your plan, when you have had enough, you leave. You may have to leave to get his attention seems to me.

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