[courtneykate23]

Im an unwed mother living in Texas, I live with my boyfriend and his parents. We have a daughter who just turned one, things aren't the best between her father and I, I have been planning to move out of state to Indiana, her father doesn't know at this point in time that I'm wanting to leave Texas and our relationship. All my family lives in Indiana and so does his, except his parents and brother. I have no intentions what so ever for him not to have contact with his daughter, I would give him any info he needed to her where abouts, I'm scared that he can charge me with parental kidnapping or file papers here in TX and order her back. Which I can't move back, I would have no where to live, and there is NO WAY I will ever leave my daughter. I want to know my rights on leaving and what could possibly happen once I do so?

[smoothy]

Its not going to be pretty because you have an established residence in TX... so you can't simply move to another state and immediately claim its your new residence. You have to live there for I believe 6 months or longer.

Until then TX is the state that has jurisdiction. And the court might prevent you from leaving with the child. MAny states see it for what it is... attempt to keep the other parent from seeing their child.

So viewed from their perspective... who would be transporting the child back to tx for his visitation or paying the costs... you, who is deciding to move? SOrry I'm not picking sides... just pointing out how it might be viewed... and is in many states.

[ScottGem]

You would only have to worry about kidnapping charges if you hid your child from her father.

However, he is her father and also has rights. You don't say if he is listed on the birth certificate, singed an acknowledgement of paternity or has otherwise been designated the legal father.

Absent a court order awarding him visitation, you are free to move. However, TX would retain jurisdiction and he can file for joint custody and force you to return the child to TX. You have to understand that he basically has equal rights. When you made the decision to have sex with him, you inextricably linked your life with his at least until your child reaches adulthood.

[courtneykate23]

Its not going to be pretty because you have an established residence in TX....so you can't simply move to another state and immediatly claim its your new residence. You have to live there for I believe 6 months or longer.

Until then TX is the state that has jurisdiction. And the court might prevent you from leaving with the child. MAny states see it for what it is...attempt to keep the other parent from seeing their child.

So viewed from their perspective....who would be transporting the child back to tx for his visitation or paying the costs...you, who is deciding to move? SOrry I'm not picking sides....just pointing out how it might be viewed....and is in many states.

Okay, well I've had people tell me that can I leave because her father and I are not married & that if he knows where she is and where is going then its not parental kidnapping, but he can go to the court before I leave the state and stop me from leaving. I would do whatever I had to do in order for her to see him, even if that meant I would have to drive back and forth or fly with her back and forth. He can easily move to Indiana, he works for ARS in Houston and they have ARS in Lafayette, where I plan on moving and all his family is there...

You would only have to worry about kidnapping charges if you hid your child from her father.

However, he is her father and also has rights. You don't say if he is listed on the birth certificate, singed an acknowledgement of paternity or has otherwise been designated the legal father.

Absent a court order awarding him visitation, you are free to move. However, TX would retain jurisdiction and he can file for joint custody and force you to return the child to TX. You have to understand that he basically has equal rights. When you made the decision to have sex with him, you inextricably linked your life with his at least until your child reaches adulthood.

Yes he is on the birth certificate & has acknowledged paternity. Like I said before I have NO intentions on not letting him see her, but its not fair to be in an unfit relationship and be so many miles away from my family and all alone.

[ScottGem]

Yes he is on the birth certificate & has acknowledged paternity. Like I said before I have NO intentions on not letting him see her, but its not fair to be in an unfit relationship and be so many miles away from my family and all alone.

Fair? Where does "fair" come into it? Was it fair to bring a child into a relationship that you were not sure would be "fit". Is it fair to to the father to tear his child from him and take her over a thousand miles away?

Look, I'm really not trying to beat up on you, but you need to wake up to reality. As I said earlier, I don't know if you made a decision to have this child or she was unplanned. But you DID make a decision to have sex with the father. And once you made that decision you took the risk that a child would result. Now you have to live with the consequences of that decision. So you need to grow up and face those consequences. One of those consequences is that you can't just up and take the child from her father. You can try to convince a court, that the child would be better off with you and you would be better off in OH. If you can do that, the court will permit you to move and you can work out with the father on how he can spend time with his daughter. But if you take the child away without court approval and he goes to court to establish custody, he could win primary custody and be given the right to come to OH and bring his daughter back to TX whether you come or not.

This is the reality of the situation you have gotten yourself into based on decisions you have made for your life.

[courtneykate23]

Fair? Where does "fair" come into it? Was it fair to bring a child into a relationship that you were not sure would be "fit". Is it fair to to the father to tear his child from him and take her over a thousand miles away?

Look, I'm really not trying to beat up on you, but you need to wake up to reality. As I said earlier, I don't know if you made a decision to have this child or she was unplanned. But you DID make a decision to have sex with the father. And once you made that decision you took the risk that a child would result. Now you have to live with the consequences of that decision. So you need to grow up and face those consequences. One of those consequences is that you can't just up and take the child from her father. You can try to convince a court, that the child would be better off with you and you would be better off in OH. If you can do that, the court will permit you to move and you can work out with the father on how he can spend time with his daughter. But if you take the child away without court approval and he goes to court to establish custody, he could win primary custody and be given the right to come to OH and bring his daughter back to TX whether you come or not.

This is the reality of the situation you have gotten yourself into based on decisions you have made for your life.

I think I know the reality of my situation. My daughter is not a consequence, she is a blessing. I am the one who is with her 24/7, her father sees her maybe an hour a night and even when he has the opportunity to see her more he plays on his xbox. As for bringing her into an unfit relationship, we didn't, but life happens and things don't always turn out the way you planned, so how dare you say that. I didn't post this question for your opinions on my daughter, I just want legal info & like I said before I have no family in TX that's why I said its not fair,he has a support system here with him and I don't and no its not fair to move is daughter that far away but he can easily move to IN and still have his family with him, I would do anything I can to make sure they see each other, but thank you for legal information.

[N0help4u]

My daughters mother in law left Ohio with her daughternd went to Ga. Ohio made her bring the daughter back. Now she has to fly or drive to Ohio for court and to get her visitations

[courtneykate23]

My daughters mother in law left Ohio with her daughternd went to Ga. Ohio made her bring the daughter back. Now she has to fly or drive to Ohio for court and to get her visitations

This is what I am most scared that might happen. My daughter and I are inseparable. I would never be able to live like that. I think I need to really talk to my boyfriend and see if we can work out an agreement.

[ScottGem]

I think I know the reality of my situation. my daughter is not a consequence, she is a blessing. I am the one who is with her 24/7, her father sees her maybe an hour a night and even when he has the opportunity to see her more he plays on his xbox. As for bringing her into an unfit relationship, we didnt, but life happens and things dont always turn out the way you planned, so how dare you say that. I didnt post this question for your opinions on my daughter, I just want legal info & like I said before I have no family in TX thats why I said its not fair,he has a support system here with him and I dont and no its not fair to move is daughter that far away but he can easily move to IN and still have his family with him, I would do anything i can to make sure they see eachother, but thank you for legal information.

First, this site is unlike other similar sites. We don't just answer the stated question but try to provide information about the whole situation. So whether you posted just for legal info or not, the situation with your daughter is very pertinent to your whole problem.

As I said, I'm not trying to beat up on you, but facts are facts. And, while I'm sure your daughter is a blessing, she is also a consequence. You said it yourself; " life happens and things dont always turn out the way you planned". So that is why I dare say what I said. From your own words, you didn't plan to have a child. Especially not with this man. But the fact remains you chose to have sex with him. And when you made that choice, you took on certain risks.

And you have to face up to the fact that a court will look that he has a life setup in TX. And you are the one wanting to move not him. I'm sorry this is not fair to you, but its no all about what you want. He has rights too.

So you got to court and show the court how little attention he pays to your daughter. Again, you have to convince the court that it will be better for her to stay with you in IN then to stay with him in TX. I really hope you can do that. But if you leave without court approval and if he does file then you will have to fight it in TX courts. And he stands a good chance of winning which will force you to return or have your daughter return.

Believe me, I hope it doesn't come to that and maybe I am painting a worst case scenario. But you need to be prepared for that.

[smoothy]

Okay, well ive had people tell me that can I leave because her father and I are not married & that if he knows where she is and where is going then its not parental kidnapping, but he can go to the court before I leave the state and stop me from leaving. I would do whatever I had to do in order for her to see him, even if that ment I would have to drive back and forth or fly with her back and forth. He can easily move to indiana, he works for ARS in Houston and they have ARS in Lafayette, where I plan on moving and all his family is there...

He can go to the court in TX AFTER you leave and force the return of at least the child.

I've known women its happened to before. So don't assume it can't or won't happen.

Also... he isn't obligated to move because you decide to move... where ones family is or isn't has no bearing on this. The fact he chose TX to live is what matters.

I'm speaking as someone who does not live where I grew up because of job opportunities. It's a mistake to rely on ONE employer... as that one can easily get rid of you for a number of reasons and where does that leave you.. Incidentally... you have to be exceptionally careful about what one assumes is or isn't something. The only opinion that matters is what the court will view it as. This the only opinion that matters is the Judges.

[N0help4u]

That is what she is afraid of. The Ohio Judge told my daughters mother in law that she ''purposely'' took her daughter thinking she could get away with it. They were really hard on her.

[smoothy]

That is what she is afraid of. The Ohio Judge told my daughters mother in law that she ''purposely'' took her daughter thinking she could get away with it. They were really hard on her.

Exactly... the mere appearance of something can carriy more weight than if that was her actually intent.

I recommend she consult a lawyer before she makes any moves.

She may have the best of intentions... but there are so many parents that do this out of spite every day... that the court sees. It will be their first thought. Even if it was never in her mind.

[N0help4u]

And sometimes people are forced with little to no options. I think that is what she is worried, having to be homeless in Tx to fight this or going to Ohio and the court seeing it as she ran.

[AK lawyer]

"Tex. Penal Code § 25.03. Interference With Child Custody.

(a) A person commits an offense if the person takes or retains a child younger than 18 years when the person:
(1) knows that the person's taking or retention violates the express terms of a judgment or order, including a temporary order, of a court disposing of the child's custody; or
Updated 10/2008
(2) has not been awarded custody of the child by a court of competent jurisdiction, knows that a suit for divorce or a civil suit or application for habeas corpus to dispose of the child's custody has been filed, and takes the child out of the geographic area of the counties composing the judicial district if the court is a district court or the county if the court is a statutory county court, without the permission of the court and with the intent to deprive the court of authority over the child.

(b) A noncustodial parent commits an offense if, with the intent to interfere with the lawful custody of a child younger than 18 years, the noncustodial parent knowingly entices or persuades the child to leave the custody of the custodial parent, guardian, or person standing in the stead of the custodial parent or guardian of the child.

(c) It is a defense to prosecution under Subsection (a)(2) that the actor returned the child to the geographic area of the counties composing the judicial district if the court is a district court or the county if the court is a statutory county court, within three days after the date of the commission of the offense.

(d) An offense under this section is a state jail felony.
"

I see several defenses here to his charging here with violation of this Texas criminal statute.

1. No suit for custody is pending;
2. No intent to deprive the Texas court of jurisdiction

[Dandrea]

It is not right for anyone to say what is fair. Matter of opinion. Many move off and not consider the other parent what so ever. You move to where you can support your child and give him/her the best life possible. Because "all" people makes mistakes does not mean you have to continue to make mistakes by making a continued bad choice. If he hasn't married you then you don't have to make your life revolve around him. You make it revolve around your child and make the choices to where it hurts the child the least. Have written out why you feel it is in the best interest of your child for you to move vs. to staying. And leave it at that. It has nothing to do with how others view squat. When a judge sees you making choices to the benefit of the child... that is what will be taken into consideration. If he files anything against you, it will have to where you are at not where he is at. However, and this is from my opinion due to EXPERIENCE it is best you have things aligned and let him know before you leave unless you fear him. It would be best if I left (my son is 12 and father has rights to visit) but I think of the emotional stability of my son to having a relationship with his dad however, it is hard to keep work in my field where I am at and it would be good to move for that reason but, I have bared it.

1. Not married.
2. No court order showing she has to stay in jurisdiction.
3. Leaving all information to the whereabouts of the child SHOWS he is able to visit.
However, I am not in Texas. (Thank God) You are not bound to stay with him but, it seems as AK Lawyer brought out that this is something you CAN get in trouble for.
You will have to go according by law. The child stays with the mother unless the father can prove you are unfit. If you have no place to stay in Texas but need to leave then Ohio only being the place you can be, file for a full custody order and state the address in Ohio to where you have to go for it's the only place for stability at this time. That this is the only place you have to go. This will show the court that you are not running because you have filed for full custody. I'm sure they would want mediation and this would be something you have to come back for. Just get ready.. it is very emotionally draining.

[ScottGem]

It is not right for anyone to say what is fair. Matter of opinion.

You are right there. But it was the OP that brought up what was fair. I was trying to point out to her that fairness is in the eye of the beholder and that other people (like a judge), might look on fairness in a different way.

I would also like to point out, since you are new here, that this thread is in the Family Law forum. Therefore answers here have to conform to existing law. Your response barely addresses the law at all and the one place where it does ("If he files anything against you, it will have to where you are at not where he is at.") is inaccurate. Currently the child's residence is in TX. If the OP leaves with the child, then the child's residence will remain in TX and TX will have jurisdiction until the child has lived long enough in another state to establish residence there. So the father can certainly file in TX if the OP leaves and it will be the TX court that will rule.

Finally, the judges are supposed to rule in the best interests of the child and the hope is that they will do so, but its not always the case. But that's what I've been saying all along. The OP has to prove to the court that her moving is in the best interests of the child. The father is going to try and make the argument that its in the child's best interest to be with him. But if the OP leaves with the child without consulting the court and getting her legal ducks lined up, the court will probably be biased against her.

it seems as AK Lawyer brought out that this is something you CAN get in trouble for.
.

Actually, what AK was pointing out is that, it is unlikely she would be prosecuted for interference with Child Custody or kidnapping (as she feared). Her situation doesn't met the conditions cited in the law.

But that doesn't mean that a court, especially a TX court since it will have jurisdiction, will agree that she can have leave the state with the child.

[courtneykate23]

"Tex. Penal Code § 25.03. Interference With Child Custody.

(a) A person commits an offense if the person takes or retains a child younger than 18 years when the person:
(1) knows that the person's taking or retention violates the express terms of a judgment or order, including a temporary order, of a court disposing of the child's custody; or
Updated 10/2008
(2) has not been awarded custody of the child by a court of competent jurisdiction, knows that a suit for divorce or a civil suit or application for habeas corpus to dispose of the child's custody has been filed, and takes the child out of the geographic area of the counties composing the judicial district if the court is a district court or the county if the court is a statutory county court, without the permission of the court and with the intent to deprive the court of authority over the child.

(b) A noncustodial parent commits an offense if, with the intent to interfere with the lawful custody of a child younger than 18 years, the noncustodial parent knowingly entices or persuades the child to leave the custody of the custodial parent, guardian, or person standing in the stead of the custodial parent or guardian of the child.

(c) It is a defense to prosecution under Subsection (a)(2) that the actor returned the child to the geographic area of the counties composing the judicial district if the court is a district court or the county if the court is a statutory county court, within three days after the date of the commission of the offense.

(d) An offense under this section is a state jail felony.
"

I see several defenses here to his charging here with violation of this Texas criminal statute.

1. No suit for custody is pending;
2. No intent to deprive the Texas court of jurisdiction

So I would need to go to court and file for cousdty before I can leave. My only problem is that right now we live with his parents, so I would be homeless in TX. The only place I have stability is in INDIANA, would a judge let me take her to INDIANA well this is in process? No one here can watch my daughter,expect me and her father can mot afford to put her in daycare without his parents help, they also don't get home until around 7 or 8 pm so she would never see them. They would basically be taking her from her mother and giving her to daycare. If I do need to go to court first then I will, I don't want to do anything that is illegal & like I said before I have NO INTENTIONS what's so ever for her father not to see her or not to know where is at, I have no problem figuring out a way to travel back and forth.

[ScottGem]

I won't say you "need" to go to court first. But you stand a better chance of getting the ability to move if you do. The bottom line here is if you move and he files before you can establish residency in IN, there is a strong likelihood the TX court will order your child returned to TX. That is the risk that you take.

Legally, you have the right to move and you can't be successfully prosecuted for Custodial Interference or kidnapping. But a TX court is going to see that you left TX before establishing custody and they will be more likely to side with their state resident (the father).

We can't predict what a court will do. Maybe you can convince them the child will be better off with you in IN. Maybe the father won't even bother to file, especially if you offer him frequent Skypes, the ability to visit, summers and holidays when she gets older, etc. We can't say for sure one way or another. We are just trying to prepare you with the probabilities.

[Dandrea]

That has not been the case in my situation. Even per county. I realize "this" particular name I've had to use is new. Although I live in one county I had to make the complaint to where the fathers jurisdiction is and then we had to go to court where I resided with our child because that is where I reside. Wouldn't it be where ever she is living is where he would need to file? I was understanding for the jurisdiction to only count when one has had established a child custody case. Since one isn't created I don't see how this would apply to where she would have to come back to Texas and as AK brought out, also not being married. Also, being the child by law is hers (not saying he is not "the father") but the child receives the mothers last name when born unless otherwise by court the child was allowed to receive the fathers last name- being they are not married. I just don't want her to "feel" she is under jurisdiction of the "father" because she is not. She doesn't have to reside where he is at. No law pertaining to that. IF she is under jurisdiction to Texas then wouldn't it be better to move and file to the courts for full custody in Ohio showing it is the only place also that she could dwell in the mean time. Far as it seems, she has custody until it goes to court. She can't stay in his parents home and do this. Logic is also used in court.

[smoothy]

Legal residence takes time to establish (for purposes of the court)... it doesn't occur the day you move in... in fact it takes usually 6 months before the court will recognise it. So her legal residence will remain TX for almost 6 months after she leaves as will their jurisdiction..