[DrizzyGirl]

I'm 20 and my boyfriend is 28. Our relationship started just as sex so in the beginning we had sex every time we saw each other which was almost every night. Now 10 months into it the sex has slowed down to only 1-3 times a week. About 2/3 of the time I am the one to initiate. I ask for it just about everyday and am pretty persistent until he completely shuts me down. I don't understand because I know I'm an attractive woman and in my previous long term relationship he asked for it everyday. My boyfriend says it's not me and just doesn't feel like having sex that often. He was previously married and now divorced and said that they went months without sex. That he would eventually have to beg for it and all she would give him usually was a hand job. They never did oral and their sex was very boring. Our sex is the complete opposite and I always enjoy it. I'm just wondering why he doesn't want it like I do? Is it me? Or him? Or what!

>Threads merged to keep all information and advice on this relationship in one place.<

[Fr_Chuck]

Welcome to real life, work, jobs, and home life.

Sex 3 times a week by and large is fairly normal for career people in their latter 20's. Every day would be more unusual but I am sure some do. Sex every day is just that, more what new couples do with they are first together for maybe first month or two. And yes, he is most likely tired, stressed or would rather talk and advance all of the relationship, not just the sex.

And no it is not about you, it is just about the fact that a large part of society just do not have sex every day.

[DrizzyGirl]

What's your opinion on couples who have completely different views on basically every opinion? We have interests and activities in common, but our beliefs and views on life, people, sex, etc. are totally different. Do couples like this last? I'm hoping the phrase "opposites attract" really is true and can work out.

[odinn7]

It can work but both of you have to be willing to compromise at times. If you both stick to your belief being the only one, you're doomed to fail.

[Fr_Chuck]

You have to agree on how you will do things.

Beliefs, whose will be taught at true to kids ?
Sex, how is it different, how will you both do it together

Friends, will you both have separate ?

[N0help4u]

It depends on the couple. Can you live without arguing about your beliefs? Are your differences going to have a life effect in the future like raising kids, careers or even where you live? Do one of you have annoying habits that will drive you crazy? The main problem with differences would be how you deal with it such as argumentive or one always has to be right or an 'I told you so' type person.
I know opposites of me drive me totally crazy and I need someone more compatible, but there are many couples who thrive on opposites.

[Cat1864]

DizzyGirl, I have merged your threads because it may seem like they are two different subjects but they aren't. How you interact outside the bedroom has a huge impact on what happens inside it.

What do you have in common? How do you resolve issues on subjects you have differences of opinion on?

Talking about sex and working out a compromise may be a good test of how compatible you are as a couple. Right now, it seems you are putting a lot of pressure on him to have sex when you want it. That can cause a partner to back off from wanting to be intimate. By pressing for more, you could be ending up with less.

[CravenMorhead]

What Cat1864 said.

As well having differing opinions, if both can accept them, can provide for some lively discourse. It will become more of an issue if you have kids. Then it is a decision of who's viewpoint you're going to teach to the child. Most of them aren't really that important. It will lead to conflict though.

Often, throughout your 20's, your thoughts and opinions tend to change as you invest more into the current world and your idealism goes away.