[lennonsnostrils]

So I'm a female teenager and lately I've been starting to get extremely self conscious, anxious and depressed. Mainly because of what people at school say about me. I'm on summer vacation right now but I still remember everything. So let's start from the top. I've been bullied ever since the first grade. I attended first grade in UK but then came back here. Anyway, I would usually get hit or made fun of for being Muslim and Arab and I would respond by running off or just hitting them back. Usually hitting them back. I punched a girl in the chest and scratched a boy's face, so after that the bullying worsened. I would face them every single day. Scared, weak, alone. I had no friends. And I was so glad to move back here, to the Middle East. Anyway, when I repeated first grade because my Arabic was really bad I had trouble making friends. Before the bullying I was such a lively and excitable child. But after that it all changed. I eventually started talking to three girls who became quite good friends. But I was still made fun of. Because of my looks, my weight, everything. I had stopped being violent towards people who upset me and I didn't care much. But the violence came back in the 4th grade. I kicked a girl for calling me fat and shoved a boy really hard for making fun of my glasses and I got in trouble. 5th grade wasn't really a pain in the like the grades before. 6th grade was scary. Especially when it was my first time in middle school. Anyway, I still had those three friends but one of them moved to another school. So I started to kind of change and I tried to be different and I hoped that people would like me. But it backfired. People hated me even more. My so called "friends" stopped talking to me. I got lower grades and often got into trouble. Towards the end of the year I got my friends back but people still hated me. A lot. In 7th grade people didn't really care much then BAM! I was accused for ruining a surprise party and everyone hated me. For a stupid thing. Then I got into lots of fights because I called a group of girls es and whores. Because they really were. But the surprise party thing wasn't the only thing that made them hate me. There was another reason. I pretended not to care and they fell for it. They walked past me everyday talking about me and laughing at me and I would just smile or laugh but on the inside I was broken. I started avoiding any social events and I started hating myself. I would cry and cry and cry every time I was alone. I wouldn't even talk to my family. I just hated everything. Those people at school made my life miserable. All those words. Those looks. Those rumours. All my sadness was hidden behind a fake smile. Now I refuse to eat anything. I refuse to talk to anyone except for my friends. My friends still don't know about my sadness because I hide it all. I have them and I love them and I have my family yet I feel so lonely. I feel like no one understands me. No one notices me. No one cares about me. I feel like and I wish I could just live in a cave and die.
Sorry for the long description by the way:/. Just please help.

[Wondergirl]

What would I like about you?

[lennonsnostrils]

What would I like about you?

I don't know. Nothing I guess. Well unless we have the same taste in music because a few grown ups have told me that my music taste is great. Which is classic rock.. And maybe if you like awkwardness all the time then yeah:).

[Wondergirl]

I don't know. Nothing I guess. Well unless we have the same taste in music because a few grown ups have told me that my music taste is great. Which is classic rock.. And maybe if you like awkwardness all the time then yeah:).

I can go with classic rock. Name a few. (Your classic rock and my classic rock might be two different things.)

[lennonsnostrils]

I can go with classic rock. Name a few. (Your classic rock and my classic rock might be two different things.)

Oh all right haha. Led Zeppelin, Jimi Hendrix, Pink Floyd, Queen, Elvis and The Beatles. The Beatles are more of rock pop though but still:D

[Wondergirl]

Oh alright haha. Led Zeppelin, Jimi Hendrix, Pink Floyd, Queen, Elvis and The Beatles. The Beatles are more of rock pop though but still:D

Have you heard of Deep Purple and Jon Lord? (I used to catalog all the music at the library where I worked, so that helped me keep up.)

Queen is good. Elvis -- I used to see his first-run movies on dates when I was a teen. I was almost too old for the Beatles, was in college -- was more into folk music then like the Kingston Trio.

[Wondergirl]

Have you thought about college? A career?

[lennonsnostrils]

Have you thought about college? a career?

Yes. My grades have gone up and I almost made the honour roll but I missed a test so that's a bummer! I want to be an architect when I grow up:).

[lennonsnostrils]

Have you heard of Deep Purple and Jon Lord? (I used to catalog all the music at the library where I worked, so that helped me keep up.)

Queen is good. Elvis -- I used to see his first-run movies on dates when I was a teen. I was almost too old for the Beatles, was in college -- was more into folk music then like the Kingston Trio.

I think a boy told me about Deep Purple. I'm not sure. But not Jon Lord. Kind of new to classic rock:/. I haven't really cared about music before I started listening to this genre.

[Wondergirl]

Yes. My grades have gone up and I almost made the honour roll but I missed a test so that's a bummer! I want to be an architect when I grow up:).

That sounds like a very interesting choice. Do you like to design things, or what caused you to consider architecture? And any special kind?

[lennonsnostrils]

That sounds like a very interesting choice. Do you like to design things, or what caused you to consider architecture? And any special kind?

Yes. I love designing. I'm always designing things whether its my homework or just a plain notebook cover. I don't really know what caused me to consider architecture though...