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    heathermarieb's Avatar
    heathermarieb Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 13, 2013, 05:49 PM
    How to get brother out of my house
    About a year ago my brother told me and my husband that my mom kicked him out. He said he was moving in with us. Since my husband was a seasonal worker we were OK with it since my brother would help with bills. But throughout this year he leaves his dirty clothes everywhere, leaves his pop cans wherever he has sat for the day and his dirty dishes wherever. My husband wants him out! My brother will leave his plate with a knife on the TV tray and I have 5 boys.
    Now my brother has a girlfriend so he is paying her bills and never even visits her. So he still sits around after work and all weekend and doesn't help us with cleaning duties. He even drinks all the cold pop and water and doesn't put anymore in the fridge.
    How can I kick him out? I'm seriously so stressed from hearing my husband complain and seeing how disrespectful my brother is. I gave him rules to go somewhere every weekend so I can have my family time and he still doesn't do that. Sorry for such a long post but I need to get it off my chest.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
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    #2

    Jul 13, 2013, 06:33 PM
    You have to follow the eviction process for the state involved. Which involved serving him the notice in writing... (California is 60 days, Florida is two weeks... its essentially 30 days almost everywhere else). If he doesn't leave by then.. you file with the court to have the eviction enforced... which when you win... the Sheriffs will come and put him and his stuff out at the curb... THEN you can change the locks.

    I assume he's been there for more than a couple months now... that would mean he has established residency... and legally is a tenant in most cases.

    In the mean time if he threatens anyone, call the police.
    heathermarieb's Avatar
    heathermarieb Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jul 13, 2013, 07:12 PM
    He was staying with us. He is not on the lease. I'm just trying to find a nice way of telling him to get out. He wouldn't fight it if I told him to leave.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #4

    Jul 13, 2013, 07:17 PM
    Doesn't matter if he is on the lease. Even if you owned the house you have to evict legally. What state are you in? You can tell him to leave and he Night ny Mutual consent bit Jim refusing will only make you have to do it the legal say rather than the family friendly way
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
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    #5

    Jul 13, 2013, 07:42 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by heathermarieb View Post
    He was staying with us. He is not on the lease. I'm just trying to find a nice way of telling him to get out. He wouldn't fight it if I told him to leave.
    He doesn't have to be on the lease... the mere fact he's been staying there more than a few weeks is all it takes... rent doesn't even have to ever have been discussed.

    If you have been telling him constantly of the things you told us... this is way beyond a "NICE" way of doing it.

    Sit down and read him the riot act... tell him everything you told us... tell him you've been nice about it until know... and the fact he has refused to do ANYTHING you asked... has given you no choice but to tell him to move out.


    If he packs up and leaves on his own... it wasn't a constructive or illegal eviction.
    heathermarieb's Avatar
    heathermarieb Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Jul 13, 2013, 09:27 PM
    When I tell him he needs to clean up and all the things we agreed to he will do it for a month or two. Then its back to his own ways. I'm in Washington state.
    AK lawyer's Avatar
    AK lawyer Posts: 12,592, Reputation: 977
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    #7

    Jul 14, 2013, 04:51 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by smoothy View Post
    ...
    Sit down and read him the riot act....tell him everything you told us....tell him you've been nice about it until know...and the fact he has refused to do ANYTHING you asked.....has given you no choice but to tell him to move out.
    ...
    Do, or not do, that as you please. But, assuming the landlord/tenant act applies so as to require you to evict him, give him a written notice ("notice to quit") that he must leave within the period required in Washington.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #8

    Jul 14, 2013, 05:23 AM
    You aren't listening. You want him out then you need to go through the eviction process. So you give him a written notice to vacate within 30 days. This notice should state that if he doesn't vacate, then you will file for an eviction order with the housing courts.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
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    #9

    Jul 14, 2013, 11:31 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by AK lawyer View Post
    Do, or not do, that as you please. But, assuming the landlord/tenant act applies so as to require you to evict him, give him a written notice ("notice to quit") that he must leave within the period required in Washington.
    Most certainly... I hope I didn't appear to imply one negated the need for the other...

    Give him the courtesy of one... but do the others as well to cover yourself.
    heathermarieb's Avatar
    heathermarieb Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Jul 15, 2013, 06:17 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ScottGem View Post
    You aren't listening. You want him out then you need to go through the eviction process. So you give him a written notice to vacate within 30 days. This notice should state that if he doesn't vacate, then you will file for an eviction order with the housing courts.
    I just want a nice way to tell my brother to leave. He will leave if I tell him too. He already wants to move out but gets lazy. I'm not asking for legal advice. Just advice on how to tell him to get out.
    heathermarieb's Avatar
    heathermarieb Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Jul 15, 2013, 06:20 PM
    And really... how can I listen when I'm reading?? To anyone else that wants to answer, remember I'm not asking for legal advice. I just want a nice way to tell my brother to move out. Somehow I keep getting people telling me to get a eviction notice.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #12

    Jul 15, 2013, 06:54 PM
    There is no nice way to tell someone to move out. You can tell him that you think he should get on with his life and that he can't do that until he is on his own.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
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    #13

    Jul 15, 2013, 06:58 PM
    How are you going to find a "NICE" way to tell him to get out of your house... when he's basically been ignoring everything you've told him before now you WANT done?

    Seriously... YOU know your brother better than anyone. You know what works and doesn't... and how to push his buttons... or more like how NOT to.

    There is no one guaranteed to work answer... and there really is none that's not going to upset him.. Particularly if he has noplace to move to right away.

    And if he refuses to go... you still have to do what we said... because it would be illegal to lock him out.

    Sorry... ever hear the saying about being between a rock and a hard pace? You are there now.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #14

    Jul 15, 2013, 07:19 PM
    First you posted this under the law section, if you did not want legal advice, you needed to post it under relatonship or something, it is obvoius he is not taking the hint and does not plan to move till you force him.

    It is time to stop being nice, or at least be direct.

    Tell him, that this Saturday you will go out with him and help him find an apartment of his own
    heathermarieb's Avatar
    heathermarieb Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #15

    Jul 16, 2013, 05:01 PM
    I honestly didn't know there were different sections.
    My brothers girlfriend keeps talking to him about moving in with her. And my brother always says "when I move in with her" . I told him he needed to move out in a month. He said he is moving out the first of next month.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
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    #16

    Jul 16, 2013, 06:09 PM
    Hopefully he does go quietly... save the awkwardness at future family reunions if you don't have to take further steps..
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