[ising4godinohio]

In my dissolution in 2003, I was awarded half of my ex's pension for 10 years payable when I am 63 or he retires whichever comes first. We were married for 18 years prior to the separation with 5 kids. I took no assets other than my dresser and clothes. In addition, I took a portion of the debt I was directly responsible for creating. I was a stay at home mom for 17 years with a high school education. In the dissolution, I left him with the kids and he was not supposed to sue for child support (he makes 100k +) but he did and I have been paying it faithfully since. By the way, I average around 25k/year. The pension was the only thing I asked for because I knew it would not directly affect the kids.

Now, my ex is considering retirement and is planning on taking me to court to request I not have access to his pension. Does he have a chance at being successful? Can this part of a dissolution be redone like the child support was? I appreciate any help and suggestions made. Thank you

[ScottGem]

You said he wasn't supposed to sue for child support. Was this agreement written anywhere? If so, what reason did the court give for allowing it? Is the pension issues written into the agreement?

When he broke the agreement about child support, why didn't you go after him for spausal support?

[ising4godinohio]

The dissolution stated no child support would be paid by either party. The magistrate said that in Ohio, child support can always be contested and I may be wrong but he may have said something to the effect about the contents of a dissolution.

In the agreement, there is mention of the pension however, I do not recall ever seeing anything like a formal addendum (ORD?) That is one of the reasons I am concerned.

I didn't go after him because I couldn't afford an attorney and had no idea what my rights were. Not only that, I thought since I voluntarily gave him custody of the kids that I lost any rights to any kind of support. I was pretty much an emotional mess, which is the other reason I walked away without fighting for anything. I was extremely intimidated by him at the time. When I finally got an attorney, he told me he could go after custody/child support/spousal support but there was no way I could afford his fees. I was barely keeping a roof over my head.

[ScottGem]

Didn't your attorney tell you he could have your ex pay his fees? That's common in such cases.

But the way it was worded it lefty it open for a modificatiron.

[AK lawyer]

... I do not recall ever seeing anything like a formal addendum (ORD?) That is one of the reasons I am concerned.. .

Was a Q.D.R.O. entered? (or is that what you mean by "ORD"?) If not, the pension fund may not be able to pay you your share.

[ising4godinohio]

I pulled out the original copy and the best I can read, it states, "The parties have agreed to divide the Pension in accordance with the attached Qualified Domestic Relations Order, which is attached and incorporated herein and marked as Exhibit ___"

There is no exhibit designation nor is there any separate QDRO attached.

If there was one, would it be locatable online like the divorce decree? Where would I begin my search?

I really appreciate all your help. Thank you!

[ising4godinohio]

@ScottGem, I did not have my own attorney during the dissolution. I couldn't afford one. By the time I did get one to help with the child support stuff, it was a waste of money, but that is a different story for a different day.

I had been paying child support for four or five years before my attorney casually mentioned the amount of money my ex could have been paying me based on our salary discrepancies. It would have been more than I was currently making working 60+ hours per week. I was too defeated to attempt to do anything about it or to drag my kids into an all out war between their parents. The pension is different though. This has nothing to do with the kids and will not affect them in any way.

Thank you for your response. I appreciate your help!

[ScottGem]

I don't know if it will be available online but you need to get a copy of that QDRO, You then send a copy to his employer.

Frankly I think things were mishandled and you could have come out of the divorce a lot better than you did. Also I don't understand where you think him paying you spousal support would affect your children in any way. Do you think he will deny things to the children because he's paying you support?

[ising4godinohio]

Scott, You're right, I probably could have done better in the divorce. I was just not in any emotional condition to fight him. I was in pure survival mode emotionally.

Do you know where I should start to get a copy of the QDRO? Is it supposed to be bundled with my court records? If so, then if I ask for a copy of all the documents I should be able to get a copy of it that way.

[ScottGem]

I would start with the court clerk.

[ising4godinohio]

Thank you, Scott. You have helped me considerably!

[ScottGem]

Good luck and keep us posted.