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Kaien-Sensei · Jul 2, 2013, 10:42 PM

I met him online and we became friends, after 4 months he confessed that he liked me and so I told him I liked him back... so we started to date. I know people will call him a pedophile or a creep but I do really love him, our age difference is only 4 years apart... is it okay for us to date?.

Alty · Jul 2, 2013, 10:51 PM

There are no laws against dating. If your mom and dad are okay with you dating this boy, you can date him. If mom and dad say no, then you have a problem. Keep in mind that dating means dating, not sex. If you were to have sex with this boy, then he'd be breaking the law.

J_9 · Jul 2, 2013, 10:52 PM

I can't imagine you being 12 and turning 20 soon. Of course you will be 13 soon.

Yes, it is bad that you are "dating" a 17 year old. Any sexual contact of any kind, even kissing, can land him in jail and be labeled a sex offender for the rest of his life.

Have you introduced him as your boyfriend to your parents yet?

J_9 · Jul 2, 2013, 10:55 PM

If your mom and dad are okay with you dating this boy, you can date him

HUH?

She's 12 and he's 17! She met him online!!

Kaien-Sensei · Jul 2, 2013, 10:56 PM

Originally Posted by J_9

I can't imagine you being 12 and turning 20 soon. Of course you will be 13 soon.

Yes, it is bad that you are "dating" a 17 year old. Any sexual contact of any kind, even kissing, can land him in jail and be labeled a sex offender for the rest of his life.

Have you introduced him as your boyfriend to your parents yet?

Ah no, he lives in New Zealand and I'm in Australia...

J_9 · Jul 2, 2013, 10:59 PM

It doesn't matter where he lives. Have you ever heard of the term jailbait? Well, you are it.

Kaien-Sensei · Jul 2, 2013, 11:01 PM

Originally Posted by J_9

It doesn't matter where he lives. Have you ever heard of the term jailbait? Well, you are it.

Thanks... ^^

J_9 · Jul 2, 2013, 11:05 PM

Alty, would you let Syd date a 16 year old she met on the internet? Same age difference.

Alty · Jul 2, 2013, 11:17 PM

Originally Posted by J_9

Alty, would you let Syd date a 16 year old she met on the internet? Same age difference.

No, and because of that, she wouldn't legally be allowed to. Sadly, there are no laws against dating. If her parents agree that she can, she can. I didn't make the law.

J_9 · Jul 2, 2013, 11:19 PM

However, there are laws against parental interference. And if you think this boy is really 17 I've got a bridge to sell you. ;)

Alty · Jul 2, 2013, 11:22 PM

Originally Posted by J_9

However, there are laws against parental interference. And if you think this boy is really 17 I've got a bridge to sell you. ;)

I agree. That's why I said that she needed her parents permission. Now, would any half decent parent allow their 12 year old to date a 17 year old? No. Do I think it's okay for a 12 year old to date a 17 year old? No. But legally, if her parents approve, she can date him.

I don't believe he's 17 either. I'd be more likely to believe he's a lot older, and likes to prey on young naïve girls online. That's a lot more common than a 17 year old boy falling for a 12 year old online, or anywhere. What do a 17 year old and a 12 year old have in common? Absolutely nothing, unless the 17 year old is a predator, or mentally and emotionally slow. .

Kaien-Sensei · Jul 2, 2013, 11:23 PM

Originally Posted by J_9

However, there are laws against parental interference. And if you think this boy is really 17 I've got a bridge to sell you. ;)

:D I'm sure he is

Alty · Jul 2, 2013, 11:23 PM

Originally Posted by Kaien-Sensei

:D I'm sure he is

Fine then. What do your mom and dad think about you dating a 17 year old boy you met online?

Kaien-Sensei · Jul 2, 2013, 11:25 PM

Originally Posted by Alty

Fine then. What do your mom and dad think about you dating a 17 year old boy you met online?

I haven't told them...

J_9 · Jul 2, 2013, 11:26 PM

I see where you are coming from now. No, I don't believe he is 17. 27 or 37 maybe. A pedophile or a pervert to say the least.

Now, since the two of you live so far apart, you wouldn't be "dating" anyway. Dating is going to the movies, going out to dinner, picnics, etc. Since you can't do that from a distance, you can't actually date.

Stick with guys your own age. They are much safer.

Alty · Jul 2, 2013, 11:28 PM

Originally Posted by Kaien-Sensei

I haven't told them...

Why not?

If mom and dad don't give you permission, you can't date him. If you don't get permission from mom and dad (you have to tell them the truth about how you met this boy, and how old he is) you're putting this boy that you claim to love, at risk of going to jail.

Kaien-Sensei · Jul 2, 2013, 11:29 PM

Originally Posted by Alty

Why not?

If mom and dad don't give you permission, you can't date him. If you don't get permission from mom and dad (you have to tell them the truth about how you met this boy, and how old he is) you're putting this boy that you claim to love, at risk of going to jail.

Because they'd kill me and I know...

Alty · Jul 2, 2013, 11:32 PM

Originally Posted by Kaien-Sensei

Because they'd kill me and I know....

Then the answer to your question "I'm 12 turning 13 soon and he's 17 and we're dating is that bad?" is yes.

Your parents are good parents, that's why they wouldn't allow you to date a 17 year old. You know it, which is why you haven't told them. That means you cannot date him, even if you want to.

J_9 · Jul 2, 2013, 11:33 PM

Then you cut off ties with him.

Kaien-Sensei · Jul 2, 2013, 11:34 PM

Originally Posted by Alty

Then the answer to your question "I'm 12 turning 13 soon and he's 17 and we're dating is that bad?" is yes.

Your parents are good parents, that's why they wouldn't allow you to date a 17 year old. You know it, which is why you haven't told them. That means you cannot date him, even if you want to.

Thanks for the advise...