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Taylor1234 · Jun 3, 2013, 01:19 PM

I don't really know what to do I really like him and he likes me but we're afriad of having sex! I know that he is 18 but he doesn't just want sex. So really is it bad that we like each other with the age difference?

joypulv · Jun 3, 2013, 02:29 PM

It's about the law, not what is bad or good in some abstract sense. It isn't good that young girls get pregnant, and they DO get pregnant. Any adult can have the adult male arrested, and anyone 18+ is an adult.
If your parents both allow you to date, fine - there's no law against that. Have you even told yours? Are you hiding the relationship from them? That's a recipe for disaster.

Alty · Jun 3, 2013, 02:31 PM

I don't really know what to do I really like him and he likes me but we're afriad of having sex! I know that he is 18 but he doesn't just want sex. So really is it bad that we like each other with the age difference?

If you two have sex he will be charged with statutory rape, he'll likely go to jail, and he'll be on the registered sex offenders list for the rest of his life. You're a child, he's an adult! It's not legal for two to have sex, even if you consent, because you're not old enough to consent.

Do your parents know you're dating him? Do they approve?

talaniman · Jun 3, 2013, 02:39 PM

Asking your parents is the right thing to do. Nobody else's opinions matter.

Alty · Jun 3, 2013, 02:41 PM

Originally Posted by talaniman

Asking your parents is the right thing to do. Nobody else's opinions matter.

But want to add, even her parents can't consent to her having sex with her 18 year old boyfriend. If they do, they can be charged as well in some places.

So no matter what, you can't have sex with this boy. Sex is off the table until you reach the age of consent.

Taylor1234 · Jun 4, 2013, 11:10 AM

I'm 14 and the guy I like is 18 soon to be 19 he is leaving for the marines for 5 years and once he gets back would it be okay to actually date him?

Taylor1234 · Jun 4, 2013, 11:16 AM

Originally Posted by Alty

But want to add, even her parents can't consent to her having sex with her 18 year old boyfriend. If they do, they can be charged as well in some places.

So no matter what, you can't have sex with this boy. Sex is off the table until you reach the age of consent.

Okay well he is going to the Marines for 5 years and by the time he gets back he will be 24 and I will be 19 or 20 so is it better to wait?

Oliver2011 · Jun 4, 2013, 11:18 AM

No. It would be stooooooopid.

Taylor1234 · Jun 4, 2013, 11:33 AM

Originally Posted by Oliver2011

No. It would be stooooooopid.

Since I just started high school would it be against the law if we had sex at my junior prom?

Oliver2011 · Jun 4, 2013, 11:36 AM

Yes

toddcandi · Jun 4, 2013, 03:04 PM

I find that most of these answers have parts that are right. He could get charged with rape, go to jail and be on the sex offenders list forever. If that at all confuses you, or you think that's not a big than yes, you are too young.
However I do believe that not every person matches their age, for example some 14 year olds are closer to 20, some are closer to 10, it all depends on the person.
For now I would suggest this
Make boundaries and do NOT cross them, keep him from going to jail
If you think about it, you would probably much rather wait 4 years to really be with him, rather than a jail sentence...
When you are 18, and he is 22, and you are still in love and you still want to be with each other, than that sounds like a strong relationship, and who doesn't want that right!
Your only 4 years apart, that's not huge. I know lots of people that are farther apart than that, my favorite example is my very own great aunt and uncle-15 years apart and they've been together for more than 40 years. :)
Another thing, you have a lifetime ahead of you for sex and romance, you may want want want it now now now, but believe me, you can wait and you won't regret it any when your older.

ScottGem · Jun 4, 2013, 03:06 PM

Originally Posted by Taylor1234

Since I just started high school would it be against the law if we had sex at my junior prom?

Whether he could be charged with rape if he has sex with you, depends on local laws.

But my suggestion is wait until he returns, if you both feel the same way then you can date.

In the meantime, its up to your parents whether you can see him.w

joypulv · Jun 4, 2013, 03:38 PM

YOUR junior prom? Why are you asking that far ahead? Why are you saying you will wait for some guy FOR FIVE YEARS??
Oh - I forgot - you are very, very young. You don't realize that 5 years from now he will be a distant memory. But I know I can't tell a 14 year old that.
BTW during those 5 years in the Marines he will have plenty of opportunity for sex... while you are home pining away, having no fun. But you won't last 5 years waiting, so it doesn't really matter.
Please don't fall for the 'I'm going off to be with all guys for 5 years and want so much to make love to you to have your beautiful embrace to remember while I am fighting, and I might die, and we will have never had the chance... '
That's the oldest line since the cave man went off with his spear to fight the tribe next door.

Alty · Jun 4, 2013, 03:52 PM

Originally Posted by joypulv

YOUR junior prom? Why are you asking that far ahead? Why are you saying you will wait for some guy FOR FIVE YEARS???
Oh - I forgot - you are very, very young. You don't realize that 5 years from now he will be a distant memory. But I know I can't tell a 14 year old that.
BTW during those 5 years in the Marines he will have plenty of opportunity for sex... while you are home pining away, having no fun. But you won't last 5 years waiting, so it doesn't really matter.
Please don't fall for the 'I'm going off to be with all guys for 5 years and want so much to make love to you to have your beautiful embrace to remember while I am fighting, and I might die, and we will have never had the chance...'
That's the oldest line since the cave man went off with his spear to fight the tribe next door.

Best answer ever! So true. Sadly, we're talking to a 14 year old, so all she'll hear is "blah, blah, blah, I may die, blah, blah, blah, I love you, really I do, blah blah, blah". Then, when he's in the Marines and she's raising his baby, and he never once contacts her, she'll suddenly realize that she made a huge mistake.

Happens all the time. That's why there are laws about children having sex, because children aren't mature enough, no matter how mature they act or how mature they think they are, to really grasp the consequences of sex.

J_9 · Jun 4, 2013, 03:54 PM

YOUR junior prom? Why are you asking that far ahead? Why are you saying you will wait for some guy FOR FIVE YEARS??
Oh - I forgot - you are very, very young. You don't realize that 5 years from now he will be a distant memory. But I know I can't tell a 14 year old that.
BTW during those 5 years in the Marines he will have plenty of opportunity for sex... while you are home pining away, having no fun. But you won't last 5 years waiting, so it doesn't really matter.
Please don't fall for the 'I'm going off to be with all guys for 5 years and want so much to make love to you to have your beautiful embrace to remember while I am fighting, and I might die, and we will have never had the chance... '
That's the oldest line since the cave man went off with his spear to fight the tribe next door.

Love it! Love it! Love it!

Oliver2011 · Jun 5, 2013, 04:44 AM

[QUOTE=Alty;3477836]Best answer ever! So true. Sadly, we're talking to a 14 year old, QUOTE]

You think? Or someone else, hmmmmmm. Wish we could know for sure.