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laundi · May 5, 2013, 02:04 PM

I'm 19 years old and I've been dating a guy who's 26. I have severe social anxiety and he's the first guy I've really ever met that I've felt comfortable around. He's obviously not a virgin and when I told him I was, we were in the middle of making out, and he stopped for a few seconds and blankly stared at me and then said "I don't want to do anything to make you uncomfortable." Anytime we're kissing, he asks if he's going too far and stops immediately if I say yes. He appears to respect me but the thing is that I feel slightly guilty that I haven't gone further with him. I mean, he's 26 years old and I doubt he's had to deal with a virgin in many years. I've actually been considering sleeping with him lately (not because of my guilt but because I trust him and I kind of want to get it over with) but I am a little intimidated by him sexually. I've never even given a blow job/hand job or anything and I don't want him to look at me like a child. I want him to take me seriously. Do you guys have any input into the situation?

Homegirl 50 · May 5, 2013, 02:31 PM

What kind of input are you looking for. He is who you should be talking to. He seems like a nice guy, but you don't lose your virginity to someone because he's the first guy you feel comfortable with and want to get it over with. How long have you been seeing this guy?

ScottGem · May 5, 2013, 03:04 PM

I agree with Homegirl. Sex is not recreation, it is something that should be shared between two people in a long term committed relationship.

But I also agree that you should be talking to him. Once you have decided (for the right reasons) to go ahead then explain to him that you are concerned about your inexperience and hope he will help you.

talaniman · May 5, 2013, 06:48 PM

Put this fear and concern from your mind and enjoy what you have and be grateful you have a great guy who is understanding. He obviously deals with you well and just leave things as they are. Deal with your own issues and maybe he can help with that social anxiety problem but not a good idea to sleep with the first guy you are comfortable with.