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amplinus · Mar 8, 2013, 01:36 AM

My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost a year things have been great. Had a few up and downs but what relationship hasn't. About a month ago she found an old crush from Junior High on Facebook and they started talking again. She told me she just wanted to be friends and that there was nothing there between them. She told me that I have done more for her than anybody in her entire life and she loves me.

Recently she went back to her hometown and came home to me and told me she has decided to move there to be near her family. She quit her job of 13 yrs signed her kid out of a school it took two years to get her in and is moving there in two days.

Tonight she told me after I finally convinced her to tell me the whole truth that she is in love with this guy. What do I do to keep her I thought if I was supportive to her moving to be with her family that it would be OK and she would be OK with a long distance relationship but now she says she doesn't know if being with me is what she wants.

Do I just let her go and deal with the heartbreak because this is killing me. I love her so much and don't want to lose her. The thought of her being with some other guy is dreadful. But what can I do? I can't make someone love me. I believe I'm a great guy and she says the same thing. I need help. All I want to do is drink myself to oblivion.

letmethink · Mar 8, 2013, 01:58 AM

I think you just have to let her go.you can't force someone to love you.. she will be always longing to go to the other guy you mentioned.or just tell her how badly you need her and wait for a reply

Fr_Chuck · Mar 8, 2013, 03:49 AM

You let her go, get drunk once, and move on, you just start over again, happens all the time, I know it hurts but better before one year than after 10

talaniman · Mar 8, 2013, 08:30 AM

You have no choice but to let her go, as she made a decision, and all the begging in the world won't change that. She could have been honest from the start, but she wasn', so hard as it is, let her go, and leave her alone forever.

Sorry for your loss, but it will get better, just not for a while. Be very careful with that drinking to oblivion idea. Have some friends around if you go down that path. Why make a bad situation worse?

backpack2389 · Mar 8, 2013, 08:35 AM

She has completely changed her life to be with this man and the changes she made sound like they required some major decisions/sacrifices. There's nothing you can do.

She is not 'your' girlfriend anymore when she loves someone else.

fredg · Mar 8, 2013, 08:41 AM

I think you have already answered your own questions. Life is sometimes very hard. I was divorced after my first 7 yrs of marriage, with 2 small boys, who went to live with their Mom. I remarried, and it lasted 30 yrs before my wife passed away.
Heartbreak is part of life. You will get over her, and please give it some time. Have a few drinks, and then start getting on with the rest of your life. It will take some time. I do feel for you, been there, and wish you the best of luck.