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    godsaveprudence's Avatar
    godsaveprudence Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Feb 20, 2013, 08:37 PM
    How to stop being so selfish?
    Lately, I have been a mess. I have been so self absorbed and sad. It's affecting my whole life. My boyfriend told me off today because he couldn't take it anymore. After he did, I started to think about what he said. Then I realized, I have been so selfish and only thinking about myself. When I talk to him and others, I only talk about myself. When I'm with friends, I want attention so I either am obnoxious or gloomy so people ask me what's wrong. I also play the pity card a ton, saying I'm fat/ugly/anything negative so people can tell me I am not. Finally, every time I help someone I think about myself and how I can benefit from it.
    I have been doing this for too long. I hate what I'm doing and I don't know how to stop. I've tried to stop being selfish but somehow, it always go back to me. Does anyone have any tips about how to stop being so selfish?

    Thanks a ton,
    J
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Feb 20, 2013, 08:48 PM
    You give some thought before you open your mouth and say something.

    If you need motivation, remember everyone around you is going to get sick of it and walk away from you eventually.

    Also.. if you know another annoying person what does this you dislike... keep reminding yourself of what they do you dislike... and make an effort to not do it yourself.


    Its going to be hard.. but you have to start making the effort a some point or you WILL find yourself alone.

    You can also ask you closest friends to stop you every time you start doing it...

    It's a bad habit.. and habits CAN be changed... its not a lost cause.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
     
    #3

    Feb 20, 2013, 08:54 PM
    Have a code word/term that your friends say when you do this. "Snickerdoodles" or "kangaroos" or "Elvis Presley."

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