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alice26 · Dec 3, 2012, 09:16 AM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

No, a flirt is not a cheater. It means he's easy going around people and knows how to tease and put people, especially women, at ease.

My dad was great with people and somewhuat of a flirt. My mom was shy, terrified of people, and hid in the kitchen. I'm like my dad in that I have never met a person I didn't want to get to know better (even the dysfunctional ones), whereas my husband is happiest when everyone leaves him alone.

Actually, those two types are opposites but also good matches.

Lol that's funny because that's how we are ,iim shy & his not at all.all theold ladies tell us he is handsome .when they say it I don't mind.so I'm sure he knows what his doing.

Wondergirl · Dec 3, 2012, 09:20 AM

Originally Posted by alice26

Lol that's funny because that's how we are ,iim shy & his not at all.all theold ladies tell us he is handsome .when they say it I don't mind.so I'm sure he knows wat his doing.

Compliment him once in a while. He's doing something that some people would give their eyeteeth to be able to do. (Read some of the threads on this site if you don't believe me.) It's a gift to be able to put people at ease. I even chat with telemarketers who call my house.

alice26 · Dec 3, 2012, 09:28 AM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Compliment him once in a while. He's doing something that some people would give their eyeteeth to be able to do. (Read some of the threads on this site if you don't believe me.) It's a gift to be able to put people at ease. I even chat with telemarketers who call my house.

I do compliment him,I try to make him feel good about himself ,like I would want him to do to me ,last thread I was asking about him y doesn't he compliment me ,& he told me I' look pretty when we were going out,iguess it just how he is, he don't like to show it lol.really you get paid or its free?

Wondergirl · Dec 3, 2012, 09:32 AM

Originally Posted by alice26

you get paid or its free?

For being on here? I'm a volunteer. I'm a retired librarian and am also a counselor, so this way my clients are all over the world. :)

I hope you come back to ask more questions that come up in your life.

alice26 · Dec 3, 2012, 09:38 AM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

For being on here? I'm a volunteer. I'm a retired librarian and am also a counselor, so this way my clients are all over the world. :)

I hope you come back to ask more questions that come up in your life.

Yess I sure will , I don't talk to friends anymore,so iiwill b back,thanks again:)

alice26 · Jan 29, 2013, 07:32 PM

Idk if I'm overreacting but I get very upset because my boyfriend doesn't bother to call me on his 45 min lunch.. or sumetimes he has overtime&he still won't kall on the other 30 min break.. im just home alone board&i don't talk to friends nomre so iiwould like to talk to him that's y I gave him a phone&it seems like I have to beg him to call &iitgets meh sad&mad.. should I care or not.wat should I do?

odinn7 · Jan 29, 2013, 07:34 PM

You sound a little bit needy.

Why do you not have friends anymore?

alice26 · Jan 29, 2013, 07:42 PM

Originally Posted by odinn7

You sound a little bit needy.

Why do you not have friends anymore?

That's a bad thing I want to have sumeone to talk too? I moved out of my hometown ,just had a baby so kind of don't have time for them.

odinn7 · Jan 29, 2013, 07:44 PM

The man is at work... does he talk to you when he comes home?

And really, you're getting defensive over my answer? YOU came here and asked so would you like me to lie to you or do you want the truth?

OK, I'll lie so you can be happy...
Call him all the time. Make sure he has no time to hang out with anyone he works with during break. Make sure that you are his priority. Accept no less!

alice26 · Jan 29, 2013, 07:50 PM

Originally Posted by odinn7

The man is at work....does he talk to you when he comes home?

And really, you're getting defensive over my answer? YOU came here and asked so would you like me to lie to you or do you want the truth?

ok, I'll lie so you can be happy....
Call him all the time. Make sure he has no time to hang out with anyone he works with during break. Make sure that you are his priority. Accept no less!

No sorry it sounded that way,I didn't get defensive ,I really want to know if I should just let it go&not bug him.. yes he does talk to me when he cumes home.

Idk why I get so emotional over it though.. maybe I feel too lonely

odinn7 · Jan 29, 2013, 07:56 PM

Ok, I understand.

He does need his space at work so I wouldn't expect to bother him there. You need to do things for yourself. You need to get out and do things. You need to find things to occupy your time. You need to make friends. Don't base your whole life on him and expect him to be the one to keep you from being lonely and bored.

alice26 · Jan 29, 2013, 08:01 PM

Originally Posted by odinn7

Ok, I understand.

He does need his space at work so I wouldn't expect to bother him there. You need to do things for yourself. You need to get out and do things. You need to find things to occupy your time. You need to make friends. Don't base your whole life on him and expect him to be the one to keep you from being lonely and bored.

that is so true. Its hard with a newborn to do that but I will work on that as soon as she gets bigger.thank yuh:).. by the way would that push him away if I been acting like this?

marq123 · Jan 29, 2013, 08:03 PM

You don't have to spend time with a friend to call a friend... do you have any friends you can talk to?

Also, if. Have time for your boyfriend you have time for a friend.. see if your boyfriend can watch your baby once a week or twice a month so you can get outa the house.

odinn7 · Jan 29, 2013, 08:06 PM

Originally Posted by alice26

by the way would that push him away if i been acting like this?

It might. I don't know him so I can't say for sure.

Newborns do need care obviously but that shouldn't keep you from being able to do some things with the baby along with you. Use your imagination and you'll come up with something.

alice26 · Jan 29, 2013, 08:30 PM

Originally Posted by marq123

You dont have to spend time with a friend to call a friend... do u have any friends you can talk to?

Well really no I don't trust them, that's y I'm on here lol.I will ask him about that.

Cat1864 · Jan 29, 2013, 09:47 PM

Alice, I merged your threads about your boyfriend together so that people can better understand the background for your question.

First, congratulations on the newborn. I hope you are both doing well.

I know you are tired, stressed, frustrated, exhausted, and the list goes on. I have been there. It may feel like this is how the rest of your life is going to be, but it won't. It does get better.

You may not feel able to get out of the house very much right now, but you can do things to help relieve the boredom and help yourself relax when the little one gives you a chance. Reading, jigsaw puzzles, other crafts/hobbies, on-line classes, yoga, etc. are just a few ideas. Do you have any interests that might help ease the boredom?

Are you planning to be a stay-at-home-mother?

How are you doing on the 'trusting him' issue? Is it a part of why you feel a need to have him call when you think he should have time?

marq123 · Jan 29, 2013, 10:17 PM

It either means you are just being insecure or he's just not that into you... you should talk to your boyfriend and tell him how much it bothers you, if you don't get the response you feel OK about you should reevaluate your relationship whether you think its worth all the stress its putting you through

Its disrespectful for him to check out other girls but even more so if he is doing it in front of you!

ArmstrongMiller · Jan 29, 2013, 11:56 PM

Maybe just a startup.

alice26 · Jan 31, 2013, 04:53 PM

Originally Posted by Cat1864

alice, I merged your threads about your boyfriend together so that people can better understand the background for your question.

First, congratulations on the newborn. I hope you are both doing well.

I know you are tired, stressed, frustrated, exhausted, and the list goes on. I have been there. It may feel like this is how the rest of your life is going to be, but it won't. It does get better.

You may not feel able to get out of the house very much right now, but you can do things to help relieve the boredom and help yourself relax when the little one gives you a chance. Reading, jigsaw puzzles, other crafts/hobbies, on-line classes, yoga, etc. are just a few ideas. Do you have any interests that might help ease the boredom?

Are you planning to be a stay-at-home-mother?

How are you doing on the 'trusting him' issue? Is it a part of why you feel a need to have him call when you think he should have time?

Thank yuh.. thats exactly how iifeel but more dipresses&lonley.. I told my boyfriend but he doesn't understand me.. No I don't want to be a stay at home mom.I want to go back to school asap I can't stand being home no mre having no one to talk to&having a boyfriend that doesn't want to talk to you. The trusting issue I let it go, I'm not going to worry about it no more if he cheats ill just leave but I'm not going to look for it. I just tink a call frm him will make my day better ,we had arguments about it so he knows how it makes me fell yet he don't kall..
He ask me if I want to marry him yesterday after a big fight but I really don't know I'm not happy

smoothy · Jan 31, 2013, 05:41 PM

Originally Posted by marq123

Its disrespectful for him to check out other girls but even more so if he is doing it in front of you!

Its not disrespectful... he's an adult with free will. If he was chatting them up trying to get a date in front of her... THAT would be disrespectful.

I do it all the time... wife even points out the ones she knows I like if she sees them first... she also checks out guys she likes...

What WE have however is trust and respect for each other... we both know who we are going home with at the end of the day.

If there is one thing that can become annoying... is someone overly clingy and needing constant reassurance before they will even begin to feel good about themselves.

Like most things... a little can be good... but too much can be off putting.