[milanoberoi]

I am a Sikh gal and I am in love with a Brahmin guy who lives just at the back of my house. We are in a relationship from 4 yrs. His father and my father were very good friends few years back. But as soon as our relationship started problems also started. They suddenly became rivals due to some stupid issues but his family is with us. And are ready to accept me. They like me very much. And we both love each other like anything and can't live without each other.

And now the problem is that his family is supporting us. His family tries to come close to my family but my family especially my father and grandfather continuously talks rubbish about them. On one hand we are Sikhs. My parents will never ever accept inter religion marriage and on the other hand rivalry issue.

His family is very loving but my family is simply against them. I want to marry him. And I want it to happen with my parents. We live with our grandparents. If my parents supported me they will kick my parents out of the house. What should I do?

[talaniman]

You will never please everyone or convince everyone to like each other, but you and your man can be a united front and bridge the gaps as you move forward if that's what you wish. Maybe they get on board later, maybe they don't, but you two have to be able to move forward with your plans regardless of who it makes happy, or who refuses to be happy for you.

Just as they cannot change your heart, I doubt you can change theirs either. Be nice if you could, but why waste time trying. The real challenge is love honor, and respect, them the best you can, but live your own life.

[milanoberoi]

Bt my parents don't know about my relation.. they can't even think of my relation with him.. shud I try to convince dem? because if I did so they will be in a state of shock.and my father has so much hatred in him for his father.if he came to know about my relation he will beat me very badly and kick me out of the house.. he has already done it many times

[Kennywags]

If your father is beating you, you need to tell someone and be removed from that house hold. As far as your boyfriend goes, my advice might not please many parents but I would say to keep it a secret, I don't want you getting beat, and thrown out. If you do decide to tell them, try to tell them as calmly as possible to avoid a fight or yelling.
Think to yourself though... Is this guy really worth all this trouble?
Goodluck in everything.

[Fr_Chuck]

Where are you from, I will assume not the US or Canada. In some nations, beating your daughter for disrespect is not only allowed but expected in some cultures. Along with your wife if she does not behave.

So where do you live,

How old are you?

What are you planing on doing about the relationship.

Marriage ? If so when ?

[milanoberoi]

Bt my parents don't know about our relation.I don't know how will I tell dem about it.shud I tel dem now?I am scared my father is very strict hel beat me or take some strict actions.what should I do?

Its not lyk that my father loves me a lot.. and he is overposesiv for me.its he dun lyk love marriages.he came to know about my relation.. and den he hit me.. he lose his control.and now m scared to tel him.I want him to learn patiently and understnd my situation rather dan beat me or lose his temper.I want to get married to my love.I am 19yrs old from india

[Fr_Chuck]

You needed to consider all of this 4 years ago when I started, and how do you have a relationsihp living that close and they don't know, either you don't have a real relationship or they are blind.

You decide what you are going to do and do it. I doubt they will ever change their mind, so you will have to go against they wishes

[milanoberoi]

Is there any way through which my parents will agree with our relation ?

[Fr_Chuck]

No, not really,

So you have to chose, go against them, or give up relationship