[sky94]

My last period was around may 23 although it came really early. Typically I have a 28-33 day cycle. I had two early ultrasounds with one at 7 and 11 weeks at different hospitals and they both gave me the same due date of Feb 25, 2013. I had sex with my boyfriend most days of the month except around June 17 I was stupid and had a one night stand, but he didn't ejaculate... I feel horrible about it! But now I don't know who the father is.. Me and my boyfriend were having sex for at least 9 months and I never got pregnant... So I am confused...

Please help me! Thanks!

[smoothy]

The only way you can possibly know is a DNA test after the child's birth...

That dates of you periods mean nothing as some women are fertile during their period.. others at almost any day of the cycle... all women do not ovulate on schedule.

You backtrack from the best guess due date and the window is plus or minus two weeks from that date meaning there was an entire month it could have happened.

[dontknownuthin]

Just one correction, Smoothy - women should ASSUME they are fertile all the time because most do not know when the ovulate. However, women are fertile for only a few days before and after they ovulate. If there's no egg present, there can't be fertilization.

I will second your statement that a DNA test will be necessary because this woman has not tracked her ovulation, so we have no idea when she was fertile. Even knowing the exact time of ovulation would only narrow it down to several days, and it sounds like she could have had sex with both men during that period.

It's not unusual for a couple to take a year or even longer to conceive so you can't count on that. It doesn't mean he's infertile at all. In fact, many reputable fertility doctors will not work with a couple until they have been trying to conceive for a year or longer without success, unless of course they already know there is a fertility related medical issue impacting the couple.

Just take care of yourself through the pregnancy and decide after the child is born if you want to do a paternity test. If you do, it is a simple procedure.

[Fr_Chuck]

They are correct, dates could be either, sperm in early fluids,
Facts on boyfriend, just luck not already,
DNA only way

[smoothy]

Just one correction, Smoothy - women should ASSUME they are fertile all the time because most do not know when the ovulate. However, women are fertile for only a few days before and after they ovulate. If there's no egg present, there can't be fertilization.
.

Yes, In other words that was what I was trying to say... apparently most women think they know when they ovulate or think they can feel it... most are also very wrong. At least judging by the people who post here. That and its possible to put 28 women in a room all having their periods at the same time and have 28 women ovulating on different days. NOT all on some magical day so many days after the beginning of their cycle.

No computer app or cell phone app can predict it.

[sky94]

Should I tell my boyfriend?
Is it worth it?
My life would be really really screwed if he left me...

[smoothy]

You are going to have to... better sooner than later. The longer you hide this from them the more upset they will be about it.

[sky94]

You are going to have to...better sooner than later. The longer you hide this from them the more upset they will be about it.

Unless of course the baby is my bfs?

[J_9]

And you won't know it's his until he has a DNA test. He WILL want to know why he is being tested.

[sky94]

And you won't know it's his until he has a DNA test. He WILL want to know why he is being tested.

Right... but I've read that you can determine paternity if your cycles are regular and the guys were 10 days apart. Plus if I did conceive around the 17 wouldn't it make my due date wrong? Feb 25 counts back to June 4... and I've heard they can only be 5 days off in an early ultrasound

[J_9]

As a labor and delivery nurse I can tell you without the shadow of a doubt that what you heard is more myth than fact. You will need a DNA test.

[sky94]

As a labor and delivery nurse I can tell you without the shadow of a doubt that what you heard is more myth than fact. You will need a DNA test.

But wouldn't my due dates be wrong?

[J_9]

Due dates are only and educated guess based on statistics. They are not foolproof and can be wrong in a two to three week window either way.

[sky94]

Due dates are only and educated guess based on statistics. They are not foolproof and can be wrong in a two to three week window either way.

But babies are mostly the same size before 12 weeks and I got two before then and still git the same due date?

[J_9]

I understand that. However, you will still need a DNA test. That is the ONLY scientific way to know who the cater is.

[sky94]

I understand that. However, you will still need a DNA test. That is the ONLY scientific way to know who the cater is.

Yeah. Well what's your guess on when I conceived though? Because the likelihood if ne getting a paternity test is extremely low for many reasons...

[J_9]

I'm sorry. I can't guess that. You see, if you put your boyfriend on the birth certificate without knowing for sure, you will be falsifying official legal documentation. There is also the risk of certain medical conditions that you aren't taking into account.

Being a good parent means putting the health and welfare of your child above all else. If you don't know who the genetic father is, you won't know if your child is predisposed to
Certain medical, sometimes serious and/or fatal, conditions.

You owe it to your child to find out who the father is.

[sky94]

I'm sorry. I can't guess that. You see, if you put your boyfriend on the birth certificate without knowing for sure, you will be falsifying official legal documentation. There is also the risk of certain medical conditions that you aren't taking into account.

Being a good parent means putting the health and welfare of your child above all else. If you don't know who the genetic father is, you won't know if your child is predisposed to
certain medical, sometimes serious and/or fatal, conditions.

You owe it to your child to find out who the father is.

Well you don't know my situation... if the baby isn't mys bfd then the baby is in a bad situation either way...

[J_9]

Not to be rude, but it's not necessary to know your situation. You have two possible fathers and the only scientific method of determining paternity is with a DNA test. That goes for any girl who has had multiple partners within a month.

Again, you owe it to your child for his/her medical background. Let us not forget that if you falsify the identity of the father now, and there are medical issues in the future, your lies will come back to haunt you.

There are plenty of adult children who have discovered the lies later in life who now don't speak to their mothers. Just peruse our boards if you don't believe me. You made a mistake, I get that, but continuing the lie will become a much bigger problem in the future.

I'm not judging you for your mistake, we all make them, it's human nature. But now you have an innocent life that depends on you and knowing the genetical background of both parents is of extreme importance.

[J_9]

Let's also say that you name boy A as the father and he pays child support but 10 years later you find out that boy B is the father. Do you think you would be in a position to pay back 10 years of child support?