[jhuck]

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years mostly happily. No major issues. Just small disagreements here and there. Months ago I saw messages online between him and another girl and they weren't completely friendly. I asked him about them. We had been in fighting a bit that week and he said he was scared that I was going to break up with him (for whatever reason),that he was sorry, and it wouldn't happen again. I asked him if she was someone he dated and he said no and the apology seemed to resolve all. A few months later I see that he added to Facebook. Again, I just ask him calmly and he says he thinks it was an accident and blocks her so that there is no temptation or accidents.

A week ago I was deleted from his profile for whatever reason. He believed that he got hacked and it was a fluke. I told him that he could look in his notifications and see if it was from mine or his profile. He seemed really fussy about checking, and reluctantly pulled it up on his phone, keeping it kind of closer to him. As he's scrolling through I not only notice that he indeed did remove me himself, but he unblocked this girl, added her back, and tried to contact her. He notices this and extolled quickly through the rest. Today I found naked pictures of girls that I guess he used to date. That's okay as I'm sure a lot of guys have these. The dates on these photos are from before our relationship. But in one photo is this particular girl.

I feel completely disrespected because both of us have come from relationships in the past where we were cheated on and underappreciated. Hes easily jealous so I'm careful not to cross any unfriendly borders with any guy. We haven't spoken in about a day since this happened. Am I out of line in the way I feel? How should I approach this conversation?

[lianmarie]

No your not wrong , you should feel a certain type of way . Your not out of line at all. Maybe you should break up with him until he can get his act right . He will come back if he loves you and tell him there's going to have to be some changes or call cannot be together. Cause your getting hurt in the situation .

[Oliver2011]

You might be headed for trouble. You should keep a list of all the solutions and resolutions he comes up with each time you discover something new. Then keep asking yourself if you are headed for trouble. Liars lie and continue to lie. Ask him to be honest with you. If he is cheating or on the way to cheating, you can do better.

[talaniman]

I would be suspicious also of a person who's words and actions just don't match up. You should really give thought to re evaluating this relationship and protecting yourself. Maybe you both need to be clear on defining the boundaries of good behavior in this relationship and see if an agreement can be made that works for you both.

You need to be honest in your approach to this conversation, and especially honest with yourself as to how his action have made you feel. Keep in mind that he has lied before, and may yet again. Its hard to make those boundaries when one is not honest, and that's a situation to be addressed and not just go along believing words without the proper actions behind them.

Don't be so in love YOU fail to pay attention. His actions are inappropriate. So is hiding them from YOU.

[jhuck]

Its so out of character of him. He has always been pretty upfront about things that wouldn't be easy to confess. And his lack of honesty here has thrown me for a loop. I've had nightmare boyfriends before so I know I need to be strong and honest and not allow him to walk all over me.

We still haven't spoken or texted. I'm not sure where to begin as he gets home from work very late. I don't want to seem like I'm right on him as soon as he walks through the door.