[pariza]

Hi, I am feeling very tensed these days.I decided to get help from you people. I am in a relation from the past 2 years.My lover is living in another city and is settled well.He is from a well standard family and he is doing his personal business.All things about him are good as I want in my life partner.We both love each other so much and wants to spend our whole life together.We don't want to live without each other and also can't think of any break up.My mother and sister know him very well.I told my mother every detail about him and she was agree for us.My sister was also happy for him but now both my mother and elder sister are against him without any solid reason.If now I talks about him with my mom she just ignores me.I can't talk to my brothers and father directly about my marriage.I am younger from all my bro and sis.I don't want to loose my lover because I love him a lot.He is still waiting for me.I am in so much confusion that how should I ask my parents for our marriage.How should I agree my mom for him.No one is helping me in this situation. Please any one guide me how we both should marry each other.I also don't want to loose my parents neither my love.Please give me some advice. Thank you

[Cat1864]

pariza (1 Posts) Asked Today, 05:43 PM — 7 Views
Hi, I am feeling very tensed these days.I decided to get help from you people. I am in a relation from the past 2 years.My lover is living in another city and is settled well.He is from a well standard family and he is doing his personal business.All things about him are good as I want in my life partner.We both love each other so much and wants to spend our whole life together.We don't want to live without each other and also can't think of any break up.My mother and sister know him very well.I told my mother every detail about him and she was agree for us.My sister was also happy for him but now both my mother and elder sister are against him without any solid reason.If now I talks about him with my mom she just ignores me.I can't talk to my brothers and father directly about my marriage.I am younger from all my bro and sis.I don't want to loose my lover because I love him a lot.He is still waiting for me.I am in so much confusion that how should I ask my parents for our marriage.How should I agree my mom for him.No one is helping me in this situation. Please any one guide me how we both should marry each other.I also don't want to loose my parents neither my love.Please give me some advice. Thank you

What reasons have your mother and sister given you for changing their minds? They may not be 'solid' reasons to you, but it might help us understand your mother and sister's point of view.

Are culture or traditions causing issues?

Why not talk to your father? Do you think your mother has talked to him and any discussions they had may have affected her decision?

Is the city your lover lives in close or far away?

Has he approached his family? Would your family be more understanding if he approached them instead of you acting as go-between?

[pariza]

My sister had a little argument with him on our marriage in the first year of my relationship.My lover beg her for me that he wants to marry me now and ask for her help.But she refused because of her ego and she is elder then me so she wants to marry first before me.This is the reason for my sister.My mother is a depression patient.She just denny our marriage without any reason.She has not discussed anything with my father.My father is little narrow minded so I am confused if I myself talk to my father then it will create any problem for me? I am not closed to my father.
My lover has told everything about me in his family.Every one there knows me very well.They are not living so far.His family now wants to come here for my proposal but my lover wants me to talk to my family first because he don't want proposal to be refused.
I am in a big confusion how I should talk in front of my father.I know that my mother will still not understand therefore I am thinking of something else.

Thank you for your response.

[pariza]

Is there anyone else to guide me?

[joypulv]

Many of us are in the US, Canada, or Europe. It sounds like you are in a country where children are expected to marry in order of age. Your sister may be resentful of your nice young man, who knows? You aren't telling us much, but I guess your family isn't very communicative. You may have to just marry the love of your life without the blessings of your parents and siblings.

[pariza]

Thank you for your response joypulv.Yes you are right.In my society marriages depends on ages and this thing is making me sick.No one listens to me in my family about my emotions and feelings.They just always taunt me that I am younger so I cannot marry right now.