[Amorah]

My boyfriend and I aren't doing so well... Lately he has been not very affectionate, he doesn't communicate barely anything with me and he knows I've been really upset lately and he hasen't done anything to help me. Now I've tried talking to him and telling him that I need a little more tiny things done for me but he does it like once or only when I remind him.

As of right now I don't know what to do, I dated him for a year and 6 months straight, then I left him because he kept pushing me to do things I didn't want to do so I gave him room to grow up, between those 6 months of being away from him I dated 2 other guys and he dated nobody. That whole time he wanted me, he was truly devoted to me. As of now he just doesn't really show me that anymore(he loves me and cares he just doesn't show it emotionally), he has never cheated on me before and really I was the one who hurt him a lot but I grew up and now I'm truly devoted to him.

Our physical life, and our sex life is amazing don't get me wrong but even lately he's just been to tired, or I have been to tired. We hang out and do activies and play video games together and all that so that isn't so much of a problem as of now.
One issue though is Facebook, I know I know.. really lame to get jealous over, but I can be insecure at times and definitely when some girl posts on his Facebook, and calls him amazing.. that's cool and everything but when I post on his Facebook he removes the post and he won't even accept my relationship request. Since he won't accept the request I would like to post on his wall something cute letting everyone else kind of know he's mine, sort of like a warning.

And kind of ontop of this subject, like I mentioned I'm insecure so sometimes I see some things girl say to him and I get afraid of him wanting someone else than me, and I know deep down he doesn't but I have tried googling and asking friends how to deal with it but it always reoccures.

I really just need different points of views on this situation, advice, and reasoning. He really is an amazing man and I really want to get serious again and look into the future of us but I just don't know why he does these things or what I need to do differently to help him in some way. I do know though that if he doesn't want to do these things for me I can't force him, I'm just at the point where I don't know what to do.

[Homegirl 50]

Maybe your relationship has run it's course. How old are the two of you?
My thing is if you both appear to be unhappy and one or both of you won't talk about the problem, it's time to end things.

[iamsam]

First off the two of you have got to want the same thing from your relationship, if you don't then what's the point. I'm a man so take it from me, if your being pushed away, you got to find out from him why. My guess is he still love's you but he isn't giving you the 100% like before, probably because you dated those tow guess during your split, while he still loved you. Why you think he dated no one, because he still had strong feelings for you and its those feelings that brought him back. The next thing is you got to work on your insecurity probs. If you know your guy to the fullest and you know he wudnt cheat then don't worry, you just have someone good and other people are going to want someone, is he wasn't "amazing" no other girl would want him either, (would you rather an ugly jerk only a mother could love?). So I'd say work on yourself then work on the two of you, because this insecurity prob you got won't go away if you leave him, that follows you and that isn't good. (I from Jamaica)

[slapshot_oi]

I agree with Homegirl, it seems your relationship has run its course.

Here's the crux of your relationship woes: your boyfriend never healed from the first break-up. You hurt him and you two split-up. For 6 months, he wallowed in pain alone while you dated other people. Instead of moving on with his life, he tortured himself. And now that he has you, he's distant. He clearly resents you for the first time you hurt him.

And Facebook is not a lame thing to get jealous over. Facebook is a great indicator of relationship health because it's a widely consumed application. If he uses it regularly and refuses to go public with his relationship and even deletes your wall posts, something is definitely wrong. Ya, it sounds silly, but it's all true.