[itsnow]

I am a 40 year old woman. I have had great sex before in my life in the past.
My current boyfriend of two years and I have the most amazing sex of my life. He understands my body, my desires. Outside of the bedroom he's supportive and empathetic. Sounds great, and it is.

I made the mistake of telling him he is the best lover I have ever had and that I feel incredibly in sync with him.

His response was that he's glad I feel that way, but that sex has always been in sync and great for him with his other partners. And that he's sorry I haven't had that experience before him. He says our sex is incredible, but it's always been incredible for him because he works to make it that way. I asked what makes sex special between us then? His response is "because it's between us."

Intellectually, I know that's a good answer from him. But...

I feel crushed. I feel inadequate. My heart is broken. I feel like our sex isn't special because it's not any different than his past sexual experiences. I don't know how to get over this feeling. I was convinced that what we had was mind blowing for both of us.

Now I feel like an idiot for even letting bother me. I love him and want to fix this. Any suggestions about how I can feel better about this? Or how I can talk to him about this?

[smoothy]

Look at it this way... many times when a woman asks a man a question... he will think they want an honest answer... which he gave.

Try not to read more into it than that... he didn't say it to be hurtful.

Think of it like this... if you buy a new pair of pants... and they are a bit snug, and you ask him if they make your butt look big? DO you want a honest answer or a lie?

He didn't say it to be hurtful, you just interpreted it that way... he was just being honest.