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    crowe90's Avatar
    crowe90 Posts: 14, Reputation: 0
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    #1

    Aug 23, 2012, 03:46 AM
    Can my fiancé keep his son from his ex?
    My Fiancé and His ex had a child. He is almost 2 Years Old. They have been split up since he was born and I've been in his life since he was 3 months old. My fiancé and I moved out of state for work for 8 months. His ex allowed their son to visit 2 times, but we made several trips to visit him. Were back ib the same state as the child now and she's refusing visitation except for a few hours here and there. My fiancé and I saw him everyday before we moved. Can we chose to keep him until she gets it court ordered for visitation? The only court they went to was for child support for her being on welfare, which he's paid up to date.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #2

    Aug 23, 2012, 03:58 AM
    Without a court order, yes she can do that. Documented it and use it in court.

    But they needed to have had a child custody and a visitation agreement from day one. That is his error there.
    crowe90's Avatar
    crowe90 Posts: 14, Reputation: 0
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    #3

    Aug 23, 2012, 04:01 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    Without a court order, yes she can do that. documented it and use it in court.

    But they needed to have had a child custody and a visitation agreement from day one. That is his error there.

    She can keep him from seeing his son with no court order but he can't keep her from seeing him? How is it that one parent can but the other can't if there is no order of custody?
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #4

    Aug 23, 2012, 04:58 AM
    Is he on the birth certificate or signed an acknowledgement of paternity?

    Absent a court order for custody and visitation, the mother has control. That's why he can't keep the child from the mother. Also, if he wants to get visitation, especially unsupervised, then he would be stupid to do so. If he goes into court and the mother argues that he kept the child, the courts will not look kindly on his petition for custody and visitation. So he should do the smart thing (what he should have done from the beginning) and file for joint custody and visitation in Family Court.
    crowe90's Avatar
    crowe90 Posts: 14, Reputation: 0
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    #5

    Aug 23, 2012, 12:16 PM
    Can the father of my child keep my son from me?
    There was no court ordered visitation or custody order. His name is on the birth certifcate. Im only allowing certain hours of visitation. Can he keep him until I go to court? I live in Ma
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #6

    Aug 23, 2012, 12:47 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by crowe90 View Post
    There was no court ordered visitation or custody order. His name is on the birth certifcate. Im only allowing certain hours of visitation. Can he keep him until i go to court? I live in Ma

    YOU are only allowing certain hours? I thought you were the fiancée? Why would YOU be going to court? Somewhere along the line this changed. Please be straight with us and tell us the real story if you want help.

    If there is no court ordered visitation or custody, then the mother generally has primary custody and control.

    P.S. Please keep follow-up to this thread using the Reply or Answer options. Don't start a new question.
    crowe90's Avatar
    crowe90 Posts: 14, Reputation: 0
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    #7

    Aug 23, 2012, 01:16 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ScottGem View Post
    YOU are only allowing certain hours? I thought you were the fiancee? Why would YOU be going to court? Somewhere along the line this changed. Please be straight with us and tell us the real story if you want help.

    If there is no court ordered visitation or custody, then the mother generally has primary custody and control.

    P.S. Please keep followup to this thread using the Reply or Answer options. Don't start a new question.

    I asked the questions fron both sides to get more well rounded answers from people seeings how I've seen multiple different answers favoring each side. Sorry if that confused you. I wasn't aware of how this site imparticular worked. I was also curious as to what should be considered bad parenting. In our eyes a fractured wrist before age 2 is unexceptable. Could an emergency petiton for custody be considered?
    tickle's Avatar
    tickle Posts: 23,796, Reputation: 2674
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    #8

    Aug 23, 2012, 01:31 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by crowe90 View Post
    I asked the questions fron both sides to get more well rounded answers from people seeings how ive seen multiple different answers favoring each side. Sorry if that confused you. I wasnt aware of how this site imparticular worked. I was also curious as to what should be considered bad parenting. In our eyes a fractured wrist before age 2 is unexceptable. Could an emergency petiton for custody be considered?
    Now you are entering into child abuse allegations and are not being entirely truthful in your information.
    crowe90's Avatar
    crowe90 Posts: 14, Reputation: 0
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    #9

    Aug 23, 2012, 01:42 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by tickle View Post
    Now you are entering into child abuse allegations and are not being entirely truthful in your information.
    Ok obviously I can get no help from this website. Im not accusing someone of child abuse. I just know through my own experience with my own child that the risk of fracturing bones at such a young age is low and I would never let that happen. In my eyes that's bad parenting. I have been nothing nut truthful ib my information. I thought this websites questions were random and I could get separte answers for each. Like I said my fiancé and I just wanted a well rounded answer since I looked it up myself and saw different answers favoring the parent who asked. Ill try other websites since this one is so concerned with if I'm not being truthful and nit concerned with a simple legal question.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #10

    Aug 23, 2012, 01:44 PM
    If there is no order of custody, no court orders, the mother can keep the other parent from seeing the child completely. The other parent may have to force visits though the courts.

    Please stop playing what if's and doing this from different versions, We want just the REAL truth and facts or normally we just stop helping you
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #11

    Aug 23, 2012, 01:48 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by crowe90 View Post
    Ok obviously i can get no help from this website. Im not accusing someone of child abuse. I just know through my own experience with my own child that the risk of fracturing bones at such a young age is low and i would never let that happen. In my eyes thats bad parenting. I have been nothing nut truthful ib my information. I thought this websites questions were random and i could get separte answers for each. Like i said my fiance and i just wanted a well rounded answer since i looked it up myself and saw different answers favoring the parent who asked. Ill try other websites since this one is so concerned with if im not being truthful and nit concerned with a simple legal question.
    You get as much help as we get honest real facts, when you start playing games, the experts just leave you alone since they think you are just a troll playing with them.

    Facts.
    1. who has physical control of child
    2. is there any court order for custody
    3. is there any court order for child support
    4. is the father on the birth certificate.
    5 is either parent a threat to the child, with evidence that could be presented in court
    6. does either parent have a criminal history

    We can give you legal issues, We don't care about personal opinions, don't care about feelings, we give you facts based on what you tell us.

    We have asked for facts, not other non important issues

    And bull, facts are answeed according to the facts given, you lie about what is happening, you get the answers according to your lie.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #12

    Aug 23, 2012, 01:48 PM
    We can't help you unless we know what the truth is. Look at this from our perspective. You have someone confusing the issues by asking a question from both sides. And that means they are being dishonest with us.

    The answers I have given you were consistent. I don't know what you think you are seeing, but if you tell us the truth we will give you the best advice. Your becoming defensive at our reaction is your own fault. But we remain ready to help if you just tell us the truth.
    crowe90's Avatar
    crowe90 Posts: 14, Reputation: 0
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    #13

    Aug 23, 2012, 01:51 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    If there is no order of custody, no court orders, the mother can keep the other parent from seeing the child completely. The other parent may have to force visits though the courts.

    Please stop playing what if's and doing this from different versions, We want just the REAL truth and facts or normally we just stop helping you
    Im not "playing what ifs". I don't know Ma state laws and I was just asking if it was means enough to be concerned. I honestly feel like you have not helped at all. I explained to you why I asked 2 different questions. Going through a custody battle can be a scary thing. Was just trying to get all information from both sides to better understand. Again sorry if that confused you. There is no need to talk to me like I am making things up off the top of my head. It was a serious question and I expected a serious answer. Not accusations that I'm lying. Thanks for the "help". Ill take any further questions to a real lawyer. Thank you.
    crowe90's Avatar
    crowe90 Posts: 14, Reputation: 0
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    #14

    Aug 23, 2012, 02:02 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    You get as much help as we get honest real facts, when you start playing games, the experts just leave you alone since they think you are just a troll playing with them.

    Facts.
    1. who has physical control of child
    2. is there any court order for custody
    3. is there any court order for child support
    4. is the father on the birth certificate.
    5 is either parent a threat to the child, with evidence that could be presented in court
    6. does either parent have a criminal history

    We can give you legal issues, We don't care about personal opinions, don't care about feelings, we give you facts based on what you tell us.

    We have asked for facts, not other non important issues

    and bull, facts are answeed according to the facts given, you lie about what is happening, you get the answers according to your lie.
    1.she has physical control of him
    2.No custody order
    3.child support has been established and paid up.
    4.Father is on birth certificate
    5 no parent is a physical threat
    6.neither parent has criminal history.

    Bottom line is we don't want to see his son on her terms. We plan on going to file for joint custody but didn't want to play her games throughout the process. I didn't once lie. You claim to not be concerned with "my story" yet continue to talk about it instead of the question I had asked
    crowe90's Avatar
    crowe90 Posts: 14, Reputation: 0
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    #15

    Aug 23, 2012, 02:13 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ScottGem View Post
    We can't help you unless we know what the truth is. Look at this from our perspective. You have someone confusing the issues by asking a question from both sides. And that means they are being dishonest with us.

    The answers I have given you were consistent. I don't know what you think you are seeing, but if you tell us the truth we will give you the best advice. Your becoming defensive at our reaction is your own fault. But we remain ready to help if you just tell us the truth.
    Like I said... I postes both thinking I would get different answers for both. I am a new user to this site and did not understand how this site works. Ive said this multiple times but no one on here seems to understand. If I had known I wouldn't have postes two questions. Im not being untruthful. Just looking for un biased answers
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #16

    Aug 23, 2012, 02:45 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by crowe90 View Post
    Ok obviously i can get no help from this website. Im not accusing someone of child abuse. I just know through my own experience with my own child that the risk of fracturing bones at such a young age is low and i would never let that happen. In my eyes thats bad parenting. I have been nothing nut truthful ib my information. I thought this websites questions were random and i could get separte answers for each. Like i said my fiance and i just wanted a well rounded answer since i looked it up myself and saw different answers favoring the parent who asked. Ill try other websites since this one is so concerned with if im not being truthful and nit concerned with a simple legal question.

    I am accusing you of lying on this website.

    Where do you see you've been truthful?

    If the question is so simple I'm sure you can figure it out for yourself - from both sides.
    crowe90's Avatar
    crowe90 Posts: 14, Reputation: 0
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    #17

    Aug 23, 2012, 03:08 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    I am accusing you of lying on this website.

    Where do you see you've been truthful?

    If the question is so simple I'm sure you can figure it out for yourself - from both sides.
    Where have I lied? I asked a question from the oppisite point of view but nothing about it was untruthful. And the reason I came to this website was to figure it out myself. Like I said... im not familiar with Ma laws.
    tickle's Avatar
    tickle Posts: 23,796, Reputation: 2674
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    #18

    Aug 23, 2012, 03:31 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by crowe90 View Post
    Where have i lied? I asked a question from the oppisite point of view but nothing about it was untruthful. And the reason i came to this website was to figure it out myself. Like i said...im not familiar with Ma laws.
    It is all documented here. You posted as the fiancé asking questions, then posted you were the ex.

    You can't ask a question from both sides unless someone posts as the ex and you post as the fiancé.

    Sorry, you have lost your credibility here, so no sense in trying to justify yourself.

    No one, no expert is going to take their time to give you what you want. We are all volunteers here.

    I think this thread should be closed, Scottgem.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #19

    Aug 23, 2012, 03:39 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by crowe90 View Post
    Where have i lied?
    I won't say you lied, but you were untruthful. In your first post you said you were the father's fiancée andl asked if the mother could keep the child from the father. In another, later post you indicated you were the mother asking if the father could keep the child from you. You may not have thought it was a lie because you didn't realize that would would connect the threads. But you were not being truthful.

    Quote Originally Posted by crowe90 View Post
    Like i said...i postes both thinking i would get different answers for both. I am a new user to this site and did not understand how this site works. Ive said this multiple times but no one on here seems to understand. If i had known i wouldnt have postes two questions. Im not being untruthful. Just looking fo un biased answers
    I do understand why you did it. I also understand you didn't realize we would connect the posts and catch you at it. But the problem is you STILL haven't told us what the truth is.

    As for getting an unbased opinion read what Fr_Chuck said. Look at the questions we asked. We asked for facts so that we could give you a legally correct and accurate answer. Frankly I resent that you think our answers would be anything else.

    The bottom line here is that you tried to fool us. Don't deny it because you have admitted to it. You asked two different questions and it, at least one of them, you were untruthful about who you are. You tried to fool us because you mistakenly thought it would get you different answers. We don't like people who try to fool us. There have been too many who have tried in the past. So, I will once more ask you what is the truth? Who are you really, the mother or the fiancée? Only then can we go forward and give you an answer.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #20

    Aug 23, 2012, 03:40 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by tickle View Post
    It is all documented here. You posted as the fiance asking questions, then posted you were the ex.

    You can't ask a question from both sides unless someone posts as the ex and you post as the fiance.

    Sorry, you have lost your credibility here, so no sense in trying to justify yourself.

    No one, no expert is going to take their time to give you what you want. We are all volunteers here.

    I think this thread should be closed, Scottgem.

    Closed? I'm wondering what it takes to ban people.

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