[Moon dance]

My girlfriend and I have been together for 4 years now and when we started dating, she was very wild and sexual. She broke up with me, after 6months, for a few months we were on and off and then she told me she lost her job and I moved in with her.
She told me that she lied about her job because she was really working at a mens "spa" and left it to commit to me. I love her very much and stayed with her. This caused our sex life to get even better and more exploratory. No other partners, just as a couple.
After a year she lost interest in sex and we began to fight a lot. She moved over an hour away and again we were on and off, for a few months and we have been together ever since.
After the last break up, our sex life has deteriorated. Last fall I found out that she relapsed, during the last break up, and had put a sex ad on craigslist. I found this on her old e-mail and saw that she had answered many ads, meeting men at hotels. Her dark sex life goes back to when she was 18 and she is 30 now.
Our first 2 years together she had lots of regulars contacting her hoping for a meet. She called them friends and I called them snakes.
She is very beautiful and she is a good person with a big heart. She has a good job now and we have come along way.
I feel that her low sex drive is caused by some of the past and to even discuss sex angers her a lot. The past has also caused me to become jealous an suspicious and she says that I just keep turning her off more. I never used to be like this but I have never been in this situation.
I want her in my life and I want our sex life to be at a normal healthy level. If it was not for these sexual barriers and the dire effects the past may have on us, I would have already proposed to her.
Any help would be greatly appreciated.

[smoothy]

Get over her... move on... and find someone new. Its clear she has already made that choice. She just hasn't told you to get lost yet.

"Nice people" tend to do that... not be blunt when they need to be.

There is NEVER a future with someone you are so much at odds about... they won't change and neither will you. It only results in pain and suffering down the road.

[backpack2389]

It sounds like she's used to a varied and exciting sex life and settling down might be difficult for her. If I were you, I'd worry that she might cheat in the future (if you did propose). However, given the depth of your feelings for her, I don't think you should just give up. When you do have sex again, maybe try something new and see if that doesn't catch her interest. If her issues are about sex, then spicing things up in the bedroom should help. If her issues are psychological or emotional, then this won't be the solution and a serious discussion about your relationship needs to happen.

[Enigma1999]

Move on.