[jay-stud]

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So I am 16 and my girlfriend just turned 18. I am a stud she is a fem. We have been dating for a little over 6momths. My mom knows now that I am lesbian but she doesn’t like the fact that I am a stud and would rather I be a fem.

She always tries to blame me being raped at a younger age and my dad walking out on us for me dressing this way. When the true fact is that I am comfortable with the way I dress and I don’t hate guys I’m just not sexually attracted to them. I’ve dated a few guys but I can never have a physical attraction to them. She is constantly always talking down on me saying she hates me and she wishes she had a different daughter and she wishes I was more of a girl.

She’s always making fun of it when were out with family and I’m getting tired of it. What should I do?

I've been with this girl for almost 6 months. I broke up with her 2 days before our 6 month anniversary for the fact that I didn’t feel she wanted this to work and she wasn’t trying anymore. I wasn’t getting the affection I needed from her.

While we were broken up I was talking to a lot of girls on FB and getting numbers and just calling girls babe, baby, beautiful, etc. But I really didn’t have any attraction to these girls except for my ex. And when we felt we were ready we were talking and we were about to get together the next day but she wanted to check my FB and she made me promise not to delete any messages so I did. And she checked them and she called back saying she didn’t trust me and how could I do that to her. Now I’m sure she thinks I’m texting all these girls and that I’m attracted to other girls when I’m really not.

I don’t know how else I can gain her trust back because she lives like 18 hours from me. But she is moving down where I live but like 3 hrs. away. So it will make it way easier. Need some advice. Was I wrong?

[C0bra_M3nace]

Have you ever sat your mother down and explained to her what you just told us? Sometimes the best way to move forward is a calm and civil conversation. If she still doesn't understand, then all you can do is prove her wrong. If you're comfortable with who you are, that's all that matters.

[talaniman]

Parents can be as cruel as as friends sometimes but you talk to them and understand they seldom will agree with anything that goes against what THEY want for you. As for your girl, is it possible this was a long distance social network thing that she just couldn't handle? Maybe emotionally she carried her own baggage, from her own past,or was just plain insecure.

That couldn't have been fun dealing with her issues all the time so yeah, a break up was the best thing. Love doesn't always work out, or is it guaranteed to last forever.

[jay-stud]

Thabk you guys for the advice. I think that my exs job had a lot to do with it and I guess she's just tired allthe time now. But we talkrd and she says that she just can't trust me and she doesn't know what I'm doing so I think I'm just going to let it go for now because I can't prove to her anything when she is hours away from me.

[jay-stud]

So I'm a lebian stud and I'm in a almost 7month relationship . We have just got back together since about 2weeks ago and we have been doing great regardless of some little arguments. She is going to be moving closerr to me . She is moving to Harlingen and I stay in Austin; its about a 6hr difference. For the fact that when we broke up I did start talking to other girls because my girl wasn't giving me the attention I needed she found iut and did the same thing to me, so we don't trust each other that much. Since she is moving to harlingen and she's studying to be a nurse and is going to be working also I don't know hoe its going to work. And eventually when I start college I'm going to be going for awhile for the job I want. So I don't know how its going to work. I am planning on staying with her but its hard. Can I get some HONEST advice thanks :)

[ScottGem]

What exactly is your question? How is what going to work?

[jay-stud]

The relationship like I need some help on how I can find a way to make its work. I keep asking her and all she can say is "i dont knoe"

[C0bra_M3nace]

The relationship like i need some help on how i can find a way to make its work. i keep asking her and all she can say is "i dont knoe"

Why try and make a relationship work when it can just work. If you're meant to be, there should be little to no effort to "make" things work, they just do.

[ScottGem]

What about it isn't working? As cobra said, you don't need to make it work if you are compatible.

[talaniman]

Hard to have a long distance relationship with NO trust, NO communications, and different priorities. Talk and work it out and see what happens. It works or it doesn't. That's the risk you take in any relationship.

None of us knows if it will work or not, or how long. The only advice I have is be honest and patient and ask your partner to do the same.

[Fr_Chuck]

Being a lesbian is not an excuse for cheating, although some seem to try and use it.

And not all lesbians are fem, and not are all "studs" *** OK having trouble with any 16 year old, male or female being a stud. But then not all men are studs, not all women who are not lesbian are fem.

One of my wives was good on the farm, planted trees from a tractor, and could most likely fix a car or tractor better than 1/2 of the mechanics in the US.

We are all what we are. It is like a mother that brings their son to our karate school, she wants him to be a stud, OK, not sure if he is gay or not, don't care, but that boy at least in this point in his life is not a stud and I am not gong to make him a stud. I will make him a great martial artist but not a stud.

Be happy with who you are, Be the best YOU that you can. Let you mom know that you know she wants something else, and maybe as you mature, you may change some of your likes and not likes. But for some it is leather and body art and piercing. I man into tattoos myself