[nandita4gmail]

It's a very sad and complicated story of mine..

I have relationship with my fiancé since 2 years... we stay in different states for our job... actually our marriage has been fixed from the family only... so there were no probs in our relationship in the beginning... but some days after meeting my family... my father got too sick... was hospitalized for several months too... so everyone got tensed at that time... anyways... after treatment he is still better now than before... but our marriage got delayed because of my fiancé's house construction... any ways after about 1 and half years our marriage date has been fixed... bcoz, as my father is sick we were unable to delay much for marriage... so his family got little pressurised for marriage from our side to fix earlier... any way they were happy finally...

But the destroy happened, when his mother died suddenly in heart blockage, 1 months before our marriage.. ( now it's 1 month she has died)... I got a deep shock... even I loved her... and marriage is also broken... and my fiancé is in a deep grief in this situation... he was too closer to his mother... he is totally shocked now... after his mother's death, 1st some days he talked to me, but now a day he stopped to talk with me too... we loved each other a lot... I know his grief... bt I think I can't still realize the total grief as my parents are there... I am staying far from him(my fiancé)... my father stays with me for his treatment... so I can't go to stay nearer to him leaving my father... I can contact with him my phone and mail only...

I am just losing myself... feeling extreme loneliness... and feeling guiltiness that I cannot do anything for him in this situation... I also feeling guilt that marriage pressure can also be a reason a bit too in her death... by thinking this I am getting exhausted... killing me day by day... but I love him more than anything... what can I do for him in this situation... shall I meet him once... I cannot loose him... please help me

[chiradeep]

Dear Nandita,

I can understand what you are going through. But answer few of my questions first.
1. Why is your marriage is broken for his mom's death?
2. Where is your mom? Why can't she stay with your father so that you can visit your fiancée?
Definitely you should meet him. But anyway, you answer me these two questions clearly so that I can suggest anything.