[ntrella19]

Hello,
I have been talking to this guy for over four months and everything was great until he recently told me that we need to "cool off" because he is training to deploy at the end of the year. He is a Navy Seal and is life is extremely busy at the moment. He was the one really into me and chasing after me in the beginning and when I finally came on board and started to believe this might just work, he pulled the cool off card. I was cheated on in the past and it continues to still haunt me. I feel that every guy is going to do the same, therefore when I don't hear from a guy in a few days I tend to to over text. Which I did in this instance. I don't know what to do or think. I asked him if he wanted me to totally delete him and he said no, we just need to cool off. Can someone give me some insight or advice as to all this. I haven't called him all week and he has done the same. Should I let this one go or wait sometime and contact him?

[Teren21]

It's kind of like a break meaning I want to still stay in contact with you but no sexual relationship and not so much texting. I've been there done that it can mean there interested in someone else and they want to know how it turns out before that person let's you go all the way.

[ntrella19]

So how should I handle this? I am so clueless where dating is concerned because in the last couple tears I was in a committed relationship for about 8 yrs. This is all new to me. I really like this guy and would love the opportunity to possibly see where this could go, but it seems his line of work is making him back off.

[here2assist]

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First, back off and do not text or call. When someone says we need to cool off give them space and tell them you respect their request. Although I believe an explanation is in order if the other person doesn't offer, don't push. If you want to preserve the relationship and maintain your dignity and respect walk away quietly. This shows that you are confident, mature and self-assured. You don't need anyone else. I wish I knew and followed this advice years ago. Neediness is a HUGE turnoff for anyone. I'm not saying you're needy however the over texting is a good indicator that you were feeling angst and abandoned. Neediness is a state of mind. If you know deep down that you're perfectly capable of standing on your own two feet without depending upon others or needing that reassurance, you will emit a wonderful vibe and become irresistible.