[renees]

Seriously. I truly am not joking. It is a problem I've been living with for years and haven't been able to know how to deal with it so I just allow it. The problem:
My husband had a heart attack at 42 and went through quadruple bypass and 3 stents. He became depressed and to make him happy I let him get chickens. We live in the city but I thought a few would be OK. I came home from work (I'm a professional medical billing manager) to hear a rooster crowing in our bedroom. He wanted to breed game chickens that people fight. He doesn't fight them . I left and went to a hotel until the chickens were out of the house. He put them at his mothers and I came back. He is now 52 heart is great. I work a lot and he does too. He makes over 100,000 per year as a technician at the power plant here. My house has had no people over for visiting because of the messes he makes with these chickens. He will get suicidal if I talk about him getting rid of them. I love him and we have been married for 26 years. He was a paper boy and I was a babysitter when we met. Our children now are on there own and get along good with him but they could have had a better childhood without the filth. They are 23 and 25 and are professionals in their field of education being an air traffic controller an a teacher for the school board. I came home today from a wonderful fourth of July party with my family, which he would not attend because he doesn't like their judgemental ways. When I opened the front door there was soup splattered on the door and the floor and he had killed and cooked a rooster with feathers on the stove to feed to the dogs. Living room was covered with garbage because he's cleaning his room. I call it his room because I stopped sleeping with him years ago. He can come to my room but his stinks and I have seen mice in there. Rats come into the Florida room where he keeps the 6 roosters he has left. The law has told him he cannot have roosters because they are a nuisance. He let's them poor roosters go for days without food or water but I won't let them suffer cause I can't sleep at night knowing they haven't eaten. I don't tell him I've fed them cause I want to see if he cares. I feed the outside chickens daily . My children tell me I am an enabler and he would just let them all die and then they would be gone. But when there is more room he buys more. He has spent 500 on just 1 rooster and looks online constantly for the next. He has spent at least 40,000 on buying chickens in the last 10 years. He won't sell. I tried that and it caused him to go into a suicidal plunge. Telling me life wasn't worth living. I cannot do anything that will make him want to end his life. Life is too short to not do the things you enjoy. I am able to go on cruises , he doesn't like them, with family or friends. When I get home the house stinks I find maggots.
How can I help him?

[Fr_Chuck]

The chickens are a major, and I do mean major health hazzard in the house, get him to buy property rural and move there with the chickens outside like they are suppose to be.

You are breaking the law, if you don't want to seem like the bad guy, call the health department, the code enforcement, or even perhaps animal control, they will require removal of the animals and could even declare the house unlivable till clearned and force you all out at this point.

He and you will die, ( really) and/or get really sick from this.

If he gets suicidal get him professional help

[Jake2008]

After 10 years of this, I think you both need help.

He needs professional assistance in understanding why he cannot do what he does, whether that comes from a doctor of some description, or code enforcement, or the health department as Chuck said.

Nobody should be forced to live this way, it is unmanageable.

You need help understanding how extreme this situation is, and why it is very abnormal, unhealthy, and dangerous. It is amazing to me that you would maintain a residence under these conditions.

I am hoping that for your sake, you remove yourself from the home, until it is habitable. I would not be surprised if the house was declared uninhabitable, and legal action was taken against you and your husband.

It is a public health issue, and I would imagine that action would be swift and severe when they find out what goes on in that house.

All that being said and presumably taken care of, the issues remain with your husband, that have caused this situation to happen in the first place. It would be helpful for you both to come to some understanding through therapy, on how you will each live, and live together.