[Matthew Froggs]

I recently found out that my parents had a baby girl before I was born. She died after only a few days of life.

I only discovered this by accident when I found her death certificate with some documents. I'm not sure if I should bring up the pain again and tell my parents that I know. I'm not even sure how to tell my brother or sister (I assume thy don't know either).

Is this thing best left alone or should I push further?

[Wondergirl]

Did she die at birth or as a child? That might determine if you want to cause your parents to revisit the pain of her loss. And will they be upset that you were snooping in their stuff?

[Matthew Froggs]

@wondergirl. She died two days after she was born. There were complcations with her birth. She never left the hospital.

They won't think I was snooping because the documents were amongst other birth certificates and passports. I only found it when looking for my own birth certificate

[Wondergirl]

Will they ask why you were looking for yours?

[Matthew Froggs]

They may be curious why I needed it (I was filling out a passport form). But they won't be mad that I went and got it. It's not considered a private area.

I think the documents were kept there because it was a place I had no reason to go to as a child. But as an adult they may not have considered to move it.

[JudyKayTee]

If they wanted to talk about the loss of their daughter, they would. I'd leave it alone.

I'm sure they have their reasons.

[Matthew Froggs]

@judyKayTee. I think you're right. The best reason I can think of as to why they never told me is because it was simply too emotional for them.

I'm glad to know she existed, but I won't bring further upset by approaching my parents about it. I may tell my brother and sister one day.

Thanks everyone for the advice.

[Wondergirl]

Just out of curiosity, how old are you?

[Matthew Froggs]

I'll be 22 in July