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Sarahmark · Jun 15, 2012, 03:19 PM

So my boyfriend always bring up the subject of having sex with him.
To be honest I'm not ready for such a thing I'm still 14 years of age and I'm a virgin. He had sex before me and he is kind of an experienced guy in thoses stuff. I really like him but I'm just scared he won't enjoy or that I get pregnant!

Guys please give me tips :s

ScottGem · Jun 15, 2012, 03:46 PM

Simple, tell him you aren't ready. At 14 you are NOT ready. No one should engage in sexual intercourse unless they are emotionally, physically and financially ready to have a child. You are neither.

Sex is not a recreational sport. It is something shared between two people in an long term committed relationship.

The more he pressures you for sex, the less he cares about you. The more likely he will dump you once he gets in your pants.

Ask him how he will support you and your child if you get pregnant. If he tells you that you won't because he will use protection, no form of birth control is 100%. You are right to be scared about becoming pregnant. And he should be scared of going to jail since you are what is know as "jail bait".

Don't worry about pleasing him worry about ruining your life.

Sarahmark · Jun 16, 2012, 12:25 AM

You are right. Buy I yold him I'm not ready he was like okay but then he kept asking thr same question again and again. Im just scared if I don't guve him what he wants he'll go find another girl who will:(

J_9 · Jun 16, 2012, 12:32 AM

Originally Posted by Sarahmark

Im just scared if i dont guve him what he wants he'll jst go find another girl who will:(

So, he wouldn't be a good boyfriend then would he? I can promise you that once you let him in your pants he won't respect you and he will brag to his friends. Your reputation will be ruined.

I really don't want to see a smart girl like you in my labor & delivery department having a baby. Just say NO and stick to your guns. If he doesn't like it, tough. That just means he doesn't respect you at all.

Sarahmark · Jun 16, 2012, 01:42 AM

You are right but how can I say to him in a good way that I don't want to have sex? I mean like, he's a really experoenced guy and all we did is kiss. He always tells me I'm just a kid blablabla but I want to prove to him I can do stuff but not sex. But I don't know how.

Curlyben · Jun 16, 2012, 01:48 AM

There is NO need to prove anything to him.
If he can't accept you for who you are then he really isn't worth your time.

NEVER let others force you to do things you feel uncomfortable with..

Also I serious doubt he is "very experienced". At this age boys, as that's all he is, are full of bravado and lies. They make things up to sound cool, mature and experienced.
Mostly it's bovine excrement and not to be trusted..

Sarahmark · Jun 16, 2012, 01:56 AM

Okay but I am going to his house today. Nobody will be home except us. What do I do. I still don't want to be boring..

ScottGem · Jun 16, 2012, 03:53 AM

Originally Posted by Sarahmark

Okay but i am going to his house today. Nobody will be home exept us. What do i do. I still dont wana be boring..

First, do your parents know you are dating him? Second, do your parents know you are going to be alone with him?

Tell him simply that you are not ready for sex. If he doesn't like it then he isn't worth it.Or call him and tell him your parents won't let you come over.

Does he have video games? Board games? That's what you do with him. If you do anything more than kissing it won't stop.

Fr_Chuck · Jun 16, 2012, 03:56 AM

First boyfriends and girlfriends don't always just make out and have sex. This sounds like the type of guy who wants he has sex with you a few times will be off for someone else, He sounds like he does not really love you or respect you.

You tell him NO, you tell him if he keeps asking for sex, you will break up with him,

Sarahmark · Jun 17, 2012, 03:24 AM

My parents know I'm dating him but they don't know I will be alone with him at his house. He doesn't force me to do anything an he doesn't always ask for sex or anything but I know he wants and I just don't want to be boring..

Fr_Chuck · Jun 17, 2012, 05:17 AM

He is trying to put guilt on your , this is a form of force. And alone at his house, sometimes the force comes from people close to us.

ScottGem · Jun 17, 2012, 06:34 AM

Originally Posted by Sarahmark

My parents knw im dating him but they dont know i will be alone with him at his house. He doesnt force me to do anything an he doesnt always ask for sex or anything but i know he wants and i just dont want to be boring..

Why do you think not giving in to sex will be boring? If he doesn't want to be bored, then let him suggest what you can do together that doesn't involve sex.

Well its too late to tell your parents that you will be alone at his house. So how did it go?

Sarahmark · Jun 17, 2012, 08:09 AM

I just told them I'm going out and went today we didn't do anything since his mom came sudenly but he invuted me over next week.. And for sure we will be alone. Im scared

ScottGem · Jun 17, 2012, 08:13 AM

Originally Posted by Sarahmark

I just told them im going out and went today we didnt do anything since his mom came sudenly but he invuted me over next week.. And for sure we will be alone. Im scared

I suspect his mom suspects him and that's why she came home suddenly.

You NEED to tell your parents. You should not be sneaking around behind their backs.

And what are you scared of? Losing him? If that's what you are scared of, if you do lose him because you won't have sex, then he is not worth keeping!

ollyfeatherhead · Jun 17, 2012, 03:09 PM

Originally Posted by Sarahmark

So my boyfriend always bring up the subject of having sex with him.
To be honest im not ready for such a thing im still 14 years of age and im a virgin. He had sex before me and he is kind of an experienced guy in thoses stuff. I really like him but im just scared he wont enjoy or that i get pregnant!!

Guys please give me tips :s

You shouldn't be worrying about sex at age 14. If that's all he seems to want from you, then break it off and find someone who likes you for yourself, not your body. Good Luck! :)

ScottGem · Jun 17, 2012, 04:14 PM

Originally Posted by Sarahmark

t he invuted me over next week.. And for sure we will be alone. Im scared

You are sending him a bad message by agreeing to come over, especially when you know you will be alone. The message you are giving is that you are willing even if you are not. Again, talk to your parents!

Sarahmark · Jun 18, 2012, 03:32 AM

I told him we won't have sex. He agreed that I'm very young and closed the subject. Tho I still feel I'm such a boring girlfriend! Should I at least give him a blowjob?

ScottGem · Jun 18, 2012, 03:35 AM

Originally Posted by Sarahmark

I told him we wont have sex. He agreed that im very young and closed the subject. Tho i still feel im such a boring girlfriend! Should i atleast give him a blowjob?

A boring girlfriend is one that doesn't make the boyfriend enjoy being with her. Not giving him sexual satisfaction DOES NOT MAKE YOU BORING.

What do you do together? What interests do you share? What do YOU like to do, What does HE like to do (besides sex)?

andrea-grace · Jun 18, 2012, 08:17 AM

Well I know how your feeling I'm 14 and have had guys ask and try to force even if I broke up with them they still insist, now you care about him if he cares just as much as you do he should understand, if he is going to still continue after the talk then he's not good enough to understand your way too good to be with him and you should find someone who cares enough to wait until your ready

Tallyman29 · Jun 18, 2012, 09:03 AM

Just how old is this guy if he's calling you a "kid"? Another thing you need to be concerned about are the chances of contracting STD's, which obviously increase the more partners you've been with... ergo he's been with... being Mr. Experienced and all.