Check out some similar questions!

ShaSha90 · Jun 3, 2012, 11:59 AM

My husband and I were going through a lot of issues. We have been married since October 2010. We have a 19 month old son. When I found out he was cheating on me, our arguments turned physical time and time again. Our fights turned out pretty bad. He would come home with hickeys on his neck, disrespected me everyday, grab me up when he would get angry. The last physical fight we had I ended up going to the hospital because he banged up my head pretty bad. I was afraid to file a police report on him so I never did But I did tell the hospital what happened. After that my mother helped me I find a place and I moved out with my son. He quit his job for another but remained jobless for a few months. I took care of my son without his help financially. I would send my son and send food to his house for a few days so his father could be with him. I waited patiently until he got a job to start helping me out. Even though we would split the time with our son, when he got the job he still up until this day does not help me financially. I found out recently that the woman he cheated on me with is pregnant and should be having the baby soon. We made an agreement that when he's working I'll be spending the time with my son and he can have him when he's off or after work because I don't trust this female being alone with my son. Friday I dropped my son off at his fathers and I told him I'm coming to get him Saturday in the morning (reminding you he is working and is leaving my son with this pregnant girl) And refused to give me my son when I wanted him. I told him if he doesn't give me my boy back I will be forced to bring the cops with me. Then he threatened to break me up if I do. I'm calling and texting him and getting no answer. And he won't give me a number to reach my son. Today is Sunday and I still haven't heard anything. I want to go the cops but I don't know what I should do. I know this is long but I'm desperately trying to find help and answers.

Sha, New York

smoothy · Jun 3, 2012, 12:02 PM

Originally Posted by ShaSha90

My husband and I were going thru alot of issues. We have been married since october 2010. We have a 19 month old son. When I found out he was cheating on me, our arguments turned physical time and time again. Our fights turned out pretty bad. He would come home with hickeys on his neck, disrespected me everyday, grab me up when he would get angry. The last physical fight we had I ended up going to the hospital because he banged up my head pretty bad. I was afraid to file a police report on him so I never did But i did tell the hospital what happened. After that my mother helped me I find a place and I moved out with my son. He quit his job for another but remained jobless for a few months. I took care of my son without his help financially. I would send my son and send food to his house for a few days so his father could be with him. I waited patiently until he got a job to start helping me out. Even tho we would split the time with our son, when he got the job he still up until this day does not help me financially. I found out recently that the woman he cheated on me with is pregnant and should be having the baby soon. We made an agreement that when he's working I'll be spending the time with my son and he can have him when he's off or after work because I dont trust this female being alone with my son. Friday I dropped my son off at his fathers and I told him im coming to get him saturday in the morning (reminding you he is working and is leaving my son with this pregnant girl) And refused to give me my son when I wanted him. I told him if he doesnt give me my boy back I will be forced to bring the cops with me. Then he threatened to break me up if I do. I'm calling and texting him and getting no answer. And he won;t give me a number to reach my son. Today is sunday and i still havent heard anything. I want to go the cops but I don't know what I should do. I know this is long but im desperately trying to find help and answers.

Sha, new york

Unless you have court ordered custody... he doesn't have to. And if you do... deal with it through the court.

ScottGem · Jun 3, 2012, 12:44 PM

If he is the legal father he has equal rights to the child. Without court ordered custody, the cops will do nothing. You need to go to court and apply for primary custody and support, You should have done that as soon as you left him.

Fr_Chuck · Jun 3, 2012, 12:58 PM

The cops will not do anything and you don't even have good evidence that he is physical. In fact everything you did really proves you were not afraid of him.

1. you left him, but you continued to send the child to him, so you were not afraid he would hurt the child.

2. He is the father and I assume either proven by DNA or on the birth certificate. He has as much legal right to keep the child as you do. So no the police can not do anything.

What you did not say you did, was file for custody of the child in court, set up a parenting plan, get joint custody with father or have set days and times for visitation.

That is what you need to do.

AK lawyer · Jun 3, 2012, 05:52 PM

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

... 2. He is the father and I assume either proven by DNA or on the birth certificate. He has as much legal right to keep the child as you do. So no the police can not do anything. ...

OP says she is married to him and was when the child was born. He would, no doubt, be in the BC. That's proof enough.