[Confushasay]

My boyfriend at the start was crazy about me he would even wear a wedding ring on his finger and say he is married to me he would be all over me kissing me hugging me always wanting sex and always wanted oral. He would say he wants to spend the rest of his life with me see me every single day and would be upset if I didn't see him one day. He even got angry about my guy friends would get jealous of them.

Recently he has been acting strange and says he is always tired which is understandable as he has been working late so we haven't had sex for a little while or if we do it's rough and quick and then he wants to sleep, he even doesn't want oral says he is too tired. And now he wants time for himself and says he sees me too much, but he was the one who wanted to see me all the time at the start. To add on he says I'm the only girl for him the hottest girl ever but yet I see him ogling other girls in front of me or looking up pics of girls then shows me which makes me feel uncomfortable and very self-conscious because half the time the girls are literally Barbie dolls, he even now keeps picking on me saying I need to be more fit (even though I am quite fit have to be for modeling work) keeps implying that I should get bigger boobs by showing me pics of girls with big boobs or going that girl has big boobs and as of recent showing me a pill that someone is selling to enhance breast growth, not to be cocky but my breasts already are a D-DD naturally.

When I speak up about it and say how I feel he goes to me I love you or says that he can't be with someone who won't let him express himself and turns it all around on me as if it's my fault. It makes no sense he says he would never cheat on me but recently these girls have been contacting him that are supposed long term friends that want to catch up with him (he hasn't caught up with any yet but he keeps telling me about it and he knows it makes me upset or he is blind! Because it's girls that are the type who would try to do stuff with a guy who even has a gf) I'm not the jealous type but I'll get ****ty if a girl bluntly flirts with him in front of me just like any person would.
I just don't get it, how could he go from being so crazy about me to now this?

Don't get me wrong he says I love you and hugs and kisses me and even his family say he won't do better (not trying to be cocky again) he even had a deep moment (yes he was sober hahaha) with me going I know I'm still at my peak and still could sleep around more but I'm happy with what I have and wouldn't want to change it I want to spend the rest of my life with you. It even gets serious to the point that he'll bring up marriage and kids and be like I want our first child to be a boy I want our wedding to be big. That's why his behavior now makes no sense! It's as if he has two personalities:-/ and they come out depending on his mood. If he is angry and upset or frustrated he will be so angry it's uncomfortable to be in the same room but when he is happy I can't seem to get him to stop kissing me.

It's so confusing I really can't keep up anymore, I'm mentally exhausted and it actually shows off because he can see I'm upset but as I do, I say I'm fine and smile it off, I used to be so bubbly but now I can't be happy because I'm always worried that something is wrong and don't want to get into a fight with him over it I've spoken to him about it as politely and calmly as I can when timing is appropriate but he says nothing is wrong or he is stressed with work or tired with work which I know is a big factor for him being so blah but even at the start of our relationship with these problems he wasn't like this.

I know it's a long post sorry but I just want some advice from someone who has been through this bizarre stage in their relationship.

[mmresd]

Sounds like you are dating a typical Gemini... :)

However, have you talked about how his actions are making you feel? It seems like these relationship, at least to him, has been based on sexual activity, it seems like it was what he was looking for in the beginning, and then the relationship just happened. It seems like now that he has had you, he is getting bored and wanting to touch other things. Talk to him, maybe he doesn't want to be in this situation to begin with, in which case you would need to end things. Or maybe, after you talk to him, you can get to where the real problems are, normally a change in actions, in a change in state of mind about something or someone, only he knows what it is, so TALK to him!

[Confushasay]

Hehe he is actually a Taurus :) yeah I have I told him look there's a difference between a subtle stare at someone then constant looking he doesn't do it all the time but when he does I always catch him out. At the start of our relationship he didn't want sex he wanted to hold out and that's what we done because he wanted a relationship not just sex, he doesn't complain about the sex he actually enjoys it because it's never the same we don't want it to get boring in the bedroom, I think it's more his work that's playing a havoc because when he isn't working he is happy, the moment he goes back he is depressed I've spoken to him and told him maybe it's time to move on with work try finding something new but he still really hasn't. He won't cheat he made that very clear but being a girl sometimes you can't help but wonder and we sometimes over think things. He doesn't want to look for another girlfriend he is happy and wants to settle down and he has told me a fair amount of times, but I still can't really figure out his thoughts at times maybe it's still his "single" mind coming out it happens to everyone but yeah I just wanted to get advice if anyone has been through this before. Thanks for your reply :)

[talaniman]

The honeymoon has long been over, and reality is setting in, and you start seeing the reality of a persons true character, and nature without being blinded by love, and lust. You seem to be thrown off by the adjustments to be made, and are insecure, but what's really happening is you are both seeing the real side you missed before, and there is much more to be revealed in the coming months, and years.

This is the natural effects that time, and reality puts on any relationship, and it's a true test of can you live with the bad side (and him yours), as well as the good. Can you communicate, work together, and make the proper adjustments when things in life happen. It's a life long process, if you stay together (No mention how long you have been together), and work together to resolve issues, and make adjustments that help you both.

What, you thought it was going to be peaches and cream, love, sex, romance, forever? Naw, reality will throw all kinds of curves, obstacles, and storms at you, and how you handle the bad stuff will define the relationship.

Nothing stays the same, as just as you think he have changed, so have you. Bet you weren't as insecure in the beginning about his quirks, flaws, mistakes. Or you think you are perfect, and its all him? Ask him, bet he thinks you have changed too. You have, no doubt,and it's a big mistake to think its all him, trust me! Been there, done that, still dealing with CHANGES!!

It's a never ending process of adjustments when you are in any relationship. You are just struggling to deal with the changes is all. Keep talking, listening, and understanding if you are in it, to win it!