[Darkwtch93]

I have been going to friends gatherings for the holidays, for many years, until recently an ex of mine showed up at one of the parties and his lover doesn't like me because I'm an ex, I'm OK with that, what I'm not okay with is that eventho him and his girl were never at gatherings before, haven't talked to any of the crowd for years, have been invited to an upcoming gathering I wasn't being that girl don't like me, I was hurt by it and I told the person who is having this gathering that I'm hurt by it since I've been a really good friend to him and his family for years, especially after he lost a sibling. So I mentioned how I was hurt mainly since we have been friends for years, how I've always been there but yet the person chooses to chose my ex and his girl to go to the gathering instead of me. I also mentioned how I was there when he really needed it the most too (meaning when their sibling died) was I in the wrong to do that? He exploded on me went off on me big time, and pretty much aired our dirty laundry on a public page where all of our friends can see it. (Which I think is childish) My best friend told me that he probably lashed out on me so he don't feel the guilt for not inviting me, and the first time he could lash out to make me feel bad he jumped on it. Now I feel horrible, I feel like I was wrong for mentioning how I was always there for him, after him exploding on me I apologized like crazy. May I also say my ex never sees anyone through the year when I see all of our friends all the time on a reg basis. So annoyed!

[mmresd]

Yes, taking out your loyalty because a friend's sibling had passed away was very wrong in your part.

You need to let things cool off, if this is a true friendship then it will be all right in the long run, stay away for awhile and let the group of friends miss you. All these drama is way overboard.

[talaniman]

Annoying yes, but now you know where you stand with this fellow and who your real friends are. He has been smiling to your face for a long time, but now you know.

Continue seeing your real friends, and don't be bothered by the phony ones, or the parties they throw.

[DoulaLC]

Oh, the joys of public pages and how some people use them. It is unfortunate that he felt the need to put on a display for all to see. I hope the public page is not where you addressed your concern to him?

Maybe he was trying to assuage his guilt, as your friend mentioned. Maybe he was just upset because he felt you were telling him who he can and can't invite. Maybe your ex had mentioned something about his girl not wanting to be there if you were and he chose them over you. Who knows.

Regardless, as was mentioned, back off on contacting him anymore. His behavior was rude, but then it might have served you better to simply state that you were hurt about not being invited without going into the details of how much you have been there for him. It makes it sound as if he owed you this. It was hurtful, and obviously unexpected, but he really can invite who he wants to.

The other friends, that you have seen over the years at these gatherings, will quite likely say something. He now knows how you feel, you have apologized, and while he really should do the same, best to leave it alone.