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Cin · Mar 4, 2007, 03:33 PM

I became friends with my therapist after therapy was concluded. Now he is having his own mental health issues and I do not know how to handle it. Any advice?

shygrneyzs · Mar 4, 2007, 03:45 PM

That is one of the first lessons taught to students in any counseling program - do not become "friends" with clients and/or former clients. It is one thing to be a friendly person, but a total different thing to become friends.

You would not know how to deal with this person's mental health issues, you cannot be expected to know. Tell him that and strongly encourage him to seek help - he cannot help himself either with this. It is always easier to see the speck in another's eyes rather than see the stick in your own. Easier to identify a crisis or issue or a situation in someone else's life. That is why he needs his own therapist now. You cannot be that person for him. I am not saying that to be mean, but saying that as a way of protecting you. You do not need to get dragged into his personal problems.

So I will say it the third time, and last, that he needs to talk to a therapist. If he does not want to see one that works in his same work place, I can understand that. But there are other places and other therapists. Stressing that to him is one the best things you can for him. Good luck to you.

valinors_sorrow · Mar 4, 2007, 04:03 PM

Friends are friends and therapists are therapists. Two totally different objectives with what can be very similar approaches. I would suggest that you tell him the truth about how you can't handle it and let you both off any hook. You owe him nothing but friendship and even that is not conducted on an "owe" basis. Some clearing the air might go a long way to preserving a friendship.

Mike_2_Help · Feb 22, 2010, 07:11 PM

This is completely unethical from the standpoint of your therapist. A licensed "therapist" (i.e. counselor, clinical social worker, psychologist) has a professional boundary to maintain. This is called a "dual relationship" and is an extreme violation because it can seriously harm the client. This why I still believe that therapists need therapists so they can deal with their own issues (which all people, therapist or not have).