[Nievay]

Hi everyone! My boyfriend said to me ''we need to take a break'' He gave me a reason he has a huge college exam in 3 weeks,and is stressed about it and hasn't studied for it. I've only been with him a month but we new each other in secondary school. He said he wants to get back together when his exam finishes. But my friends have been very negative about it.. I really don't want to be waiting around for someone who doesn't want me. He might be truthful but my friends have made me second think it.. any advice?

[DoulaLC]

Hi Nievay,

Do you have any reason not to believe him? Do the two of you spend a good deal of time together... talking on the phone, in person, sending text messages, etc.

If so, it may be that he really does just want to concentrate on his exam. Sometimes, especially in a new relationship, so much time is spent together that it can be difficult to focus on other things.

Talk to him about it. Decide whether he is asking to break up or just not spend as much time together for right now. Maybe a compromise of just a quick phone call or text now and then. Or getting together just a few times so he can have a break from his studies. See what he says.

Would three weeks really be all the much of "waiting around?" If you feel that the two of you do spend a good deal of time together, and that he hasn't really been able to devote much time to his studies, then give him the time he needs to do well.

It is understandable that you want to spend time with him, but If you are questioning his actions after only a month, then maybe you aren't quite ready to be in a serious relationship just yet. Show him that you trust him and are able to put his needs first in this situation.

You will know soon enough whether his reasoning is legit, but you already put the relationship a step back if you start questioning when it has only just started on a more serious note.

You'll have to decide when and when not to listen to your friends. Sometimes they can see things you won't, but sometimes they can plant seeds of doubt when there is no need.

After 3 weeks, you'll know one way or the other.

[Homegirl 50]

Give him the break and see where things go after that.
I don't understand "break" myself. To me that means lets break up. And if they say let's break with a time limit, that in my opinion is bunk!
Give him his break and you do your thing.