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may85 · Apr 12, 2012, 06:08 PM

I broke up with my ex boyfriend of 7 years, 3 years ago this month. I ended it because we were 17 when we first started dating and had never experienced life without each other. He wanted to marry me and I did not want to marry him and regret it. It took me a year and a half to start dating and that's when I found my current boyfriend. I found out my ex got engaged only 2 years after we broke up and he'll be married at the end of this year. When I found out, I was heart broken all over again. My friends said it was normal and I would get over it. It's been 6 months since I found out and it still hurts the same! I'm seriously an emotional wreck! I keep living in the past as to how our life would have been, how our relationship was perfect, and how I regret ending things with him. My stomach drops every time a wedding theme crosses my path and I'm reminded that he's getting married. I guess I thought that we would experience life but never find someone else. That we would end up together making our relationship stronger but instead I lost him. I don't know how to move on?!

talaniman · Apr 12, 2012, 11:55 PM

It's been 6 months since I found out and it still hurts the same! I'm seriously an emotional wreck!

You just need more time to accept that your fantasy(?) is over, and heal from the dissapointment of him not waiting for you, as you were waiting for him. You never really let go, and he did long ago. Now its your turn, and soon you will. Don't worry, after the mourninng is finally over, you WILL move on. You just aren't there yet.

joypulv · Apr 13, 2012, 12:41 AM

You might find yourself without your current boyfriend too. How is he taking this? Do you care if you lose him?
I too share a longing for what I let go. I do understand. What you have to work on is seeing that the fantasy life you have invented for your ex and you together has about a .0000000001% chance of ever having been reality. You could have been married and it could have ended the way so many marriages end. Since you will never know, you must separate the fantasy from the actual memories, hang on to the memories for their sweetness and what they taught you, but let the fantasy go. It's a mental exercise and will take time. But it's a must, or you will lose what you have now too.