[ads13]

My husband and I were married almost 5 months ago. We lived together before and our frequency for sex was maybe 2-3 times a week. He works full time and is finishing his degree so he is I'm sure very tired. But he has been doing this schedule for 5 years now since we started dating so it is not a new development. This problem began a bit before the wedding and I thought it might have been stress with the wedding. Planning long distance and working for every extra penny. The problem has only gotten worse. Since we got married we have almost stopped having sex. Frequency being 1-2 times a month. He has stopped initiating and when we do have sex (with me starting things) he is ready to get it done with. I hate this reaction it makes me not want to start things either. I have not gained weight.. I have actually lost weight and been better about keeping the house and making him amazing meals. I have tried little hints like lingerie, sitting on the couch with him in my bra and panties or just naked. I have tried watching porn with him. I have tried costumes. All of which previously worked. I have tried talking to him about it genuinely not whining. His answer is just relax and let it happen. It doesn't. I have even started to spend more time with my friends not always being available at his demand. Nothing works. I have stopped and left it to him.. Nada. Fear of rejection for me makes me not want to try. He's my NEW husband this should not be happening. Right? He is head over heals in love with me as I am with him. He does special things for me all the time and is a great husband but why the lack of sex? Or interest in being intimate with me? I feel like he is my best friend rather than my husband.

[AnnaFillmore]

If he's finishing his degree, chances are he's more stressed than he was during the rest of the year. When you're under great stress, your mind kind of switches off from things like sex and they just drop out of your list of priorities. The only problem with this, regarding to sex, is that the less sex you have, the more you can go without it.

I imagine if he's stressed, you're probably not helping by throwing yourself at him or being naked on the sofa when he gets in from work and really just wants to eat and go to sleep, but likewise, he needs to realise that you have needs.

Talk it over, ask him to put aside some time for you, maybe just one evening a week - you don't have to have sex, but just spend the time together and see where things go. And give him a break the rest of the time. Sometimes guys need a bit of 'me' time too...

[cdm1972]

I feel your pain. My husband and I have been married 5 months and he said he loves me but has no desire for sex. I've tried everything but he just doesn't want me. It's a difficult thing to go through when we are newly weds because we need intimacy also.