[DJ836]

My boyfriend and me have been together for 3 years and month, and I know he loves me, and I love him with all my heart. We have been having a problem about him loving another girl, one he's been friends with since he was 7 or 8 years old and he's now 17. Once when he told me exactly what he wants and he described her, I don't know if he realized it but he did describe her. He described my personality but not my looks but he described her personality and looks.

I need to know if anyone thinks if he'll stop loving her or me. Also should I break up with him because I'm not completely happy nor is he whether we are together or not. We broke up before a few times and the pain gets worse I feel like I'm dead inside when we are not together. Someone pleas tell should I stay with him or leave, it'll break both of our hearts but I'm desperate for an answer. He told me he has a soft heart for her, and it hurt to hear that. I need an answer please

[Homegirl 50]

If you two are not happy with each other, why stay together.
Seems to me you have been together since your early teens, you're comfortable with each other but not happy dating each other.
It sounds like it's time to call it quits so the two of you can grow.

[talaniman]

You have been together from 14 to 17? WOW, that's a long time and I imagine you both have changed a great deal, and have been through a lot in those 3 years, which I might add is a long time for that age.

Talk to him and see if some personal time for you both can't get rid of that unhappiness, as communications, and having fun on your own with friends and activities is crucial to a couple being happy.

I suspect some outside things are at play, and YOU may be putting a lot of fears, and insecurities on him not descibing you to "T" when he desribes his perfect female, and have taken it as a sign. Don't do that, just talk and see if you can keep building to make it better, and understand why you are both unhappy, and what can be done about it.

Worries about some stress in our lives can affect the relationship, especially when you are your age and have no experience in handling that stress, or worry so talk first, HONESTLY to each other, before you do anything.

Good Luck!

[PoisionNikki]

Hi I'm 18 I've been with my boyfriend since I was 14yr also an I have had this problem once with an old childhood friend but after she and him just grew apart I had some jealousy issues with it but I let it go and now his focus is on me she has her man and he has me don't give up hope because we have been together 4yrs now and were engaged we went through everything together we know each other more than we know ourselves don't give up on love if it is meant to be it will be by the way you said you guys break up and get back together I've never had this problem so I am not going to give advise with this just play it safe a guy hates nagging girls just wait he'll crawl at your feet...

[Alty]

hi I'm 18 I've been with my boyfriend since I was 14yr also an I have had this problem once with an old childhood friend but after she and him just grew apart I had some jealousy issues with it but I let it go and now his focus is on me she has her man and he has me don't give up hope because we have been together 4yrs now and were engaged we went through everything together we know each other more than we know ourselves don't give up on love if it is meant to be it will be by the way you said you guys break up and get back together I've never had this problem so I am not going to give advise with this just play it safe a guy hates nagging girls just wait he'll crawl at your feet...

In another post you said you were married. Which is it?