[Oillamp]

So there is this girl I have been in the same class with for nearly 6 years now, and 6 months ago, I somehow got to know her - before that we were more like hi-bye friends - and somehow developed deeper feelings for her. The same story is to be told for a friend of mine. So basically we both like her, and since I noticed that he was in the same spot as I, I decided to share my feelings for her with him. Instead of putting us in the spot of "rivals", it sort of put us even closer than before, which I am extremely thankful of.

However, there is some clear evidence that she likes him more than me, and I agree when my friend tells me they match more.
Seems pretty all right so far, doesn't it ? Yet I can't get rid of that stupid jealousy that leaps into my feelings every time her and my friend are having laughing together or something, and this jealousy reaches a climax when my friend tells me about the things that happened between them in a party (which I personally don't go to because it annoys me, and I don't drink) ; things like slight cuddling, long eye contacts, et cetera.

I'm not concerned about the friendship between me and my friend, that one seems pretty stable to me, however if I can't get rid of that jealousy, I am going to avoid being present when she is together with him, which is stupid, since I'd like to have both of them as friends. Why, girl friends don't need to be girlfriends to have a good time with.

Ending the post, do you think that jealousy will vanish over time, even if the three of us will may be go to the same apartment next year ? (university and stuff, you know ;) ).

Second problem (and then I'm done, I swear!) is that for now, I feel like there is no girl I could like as much as I do it with the one I'm in love with right now, and I wanted to know whether that feelings would go away as well, even if I don't stop to see her.
So if anybody has anything to say about that, I'd be glad to read it, and if nobody has gotten anything to say, well, I'd be glad to read nothing as well, it would spare me some time (always look on the bright side of life, I guess :D )

[bullski_69]

Hey man, sticky situation this one. I've had a similar one myself. I always had the best friend who was always the alpha male and it happened a few times where a chick I liked would go with him instead n I'd always pretend that I don't care. Not good. You have to realize that if that girl doesn't realize your value then she doesn't deserve to have u in the first place. Jealousy is normal, but it would go away eventually but not with u seeing them together all the time. Living together in an apartment at university is a TERRIBLE idea! Don't do it!! Your home should be your refuge from all outside influences but if u can't even escape anxiety there it will ruin your experience. When u get there, there will be a whole new batch of girls that u will like maybe even love so don't put all your eggs in same basket. Girls come n go, even the ones that seem irreplaceable. But they aren't! So **** being jealous just do what u do n make her realize what she's missing and make sure u get stuck into other birds!

[talaniman]

Give those two time and space and do your own thing and eventually your feelings will fade and change. They are just new, fresh, and intense at this time. Guess what though? Having a great time with your own friends, family, and activities is the healing medicine that will work over time.

Its happen to us all at one time or another, so now its your turn. You will thrive and survive, and learn to not act on jealousy anger, or disappointments, and let them run there course, like a fever, or cold.

Especially as you explore the new world you are about to embark on and all those options and opportunities for fun and happiness will balance things rather nicely for you. So don't waste time on what others are doing, focus on what YOU can do!

Good Luck!

[indya]

Well, you must consider yourself lucky that similar love interest did not spark rivalry between you and your friend!

The jealousy is natural, all you have to do is stop think about the two of them. You can even ask your friend not to give you details about them hanging out together. Keep her out of your head, involve yourself in other activities.

Start checking out other girls ;)

I know that at this stage you will feel like you will never be able to fall in someone else in the same way! Trust me on this one, that feeling will go away too, and before you know it you will have a new love in your life!

All the best!