[Wonderkelly]

We have been married for 8 year we have three wonderful children two from his previous marriage and one together. We have no contact with his ex until, now I just found out that he had a one night stand with her and they have a three year old child. I am trying to work things out but how do I trust him again I feel so betrayed I gave my whole life to him while I'm raising their kids he was off fooling around with their biological mother. I have tried to work things out with her but she is not the best person to deal with. Does anyone think that this is something a person can deal with?

[DoulaLC]

I am so sorry that you have to go through this experience. There is no fast way to deal with it. Some people would be able to work through it, many would not. Broken trust takes time and effort to rebuild. You won't be able to do it on your own. You mentioned trying to work things out with her, but what about your husband? How willing is he to work with you on it? Is he open to answering any questions you might have? Or does he brush it off as something that happened in the past and should stay there?

He has had time to work through it, but it is fresh to you so you need the time to be able to deal with it and discover whether you can or want to continue in a relationship with him. There is no time frame for how long that may take. It is very individual.

It is not an easy journey... hopefully you have trusted friends or family to support you through it if you need the help. Even more so, hopefully you have your husband's support to help you through it. Only you can decide whether you do.