[bucksey]

My girlfriends dad has come back into her life for the first time in 24 years. She is feeling very emotional as she is getting love from her dad and she loves it. I did encourage her to see him, as she needs to know her dad. The problem is that's all she wants. I've been sidelined, and now I'm not feeling loved. I'm not sure how to act.

[talaniman]

Act like a man that understands that his woman is greatly distracted and will make no demands for himself for a while until she has dealt with what she is facing.

YOU must deal with your own feelings now my friend, in a mature, self controlled way, as a man should. Don't add to her anxieties with behavior to get a lot of attention for yourself. That's kid stuff, and she will hate you for it, but love you if you are her rock of support. Take a step back until she gets it together, because she needs this and you know it, so act like it.

[Jake2008]

I agree with Tal.

This is a major event in her life. She will be establishing a relationship with a man, who happens to be her father, that she's not seen in 24 years.

I admire you for encouraging her, and being there for her when she will undoubtedly need you to listen and understand how she's feeling. When she figures it out for herself. This could be a great thing for her, or, it could be a disaster in the making. How good and decent a man can he be, having abandoned her for 24 years.

While she is dealing with all of this, and it will take time for it to all settle, you should expect to have your relationship with her affected by it. It's no different than any other crisis couples face along the way, in a relationship. Life happens, and is unpredictable.

I would say that all of her emotional energy is, right now, on her life, and the new 'father' that is in it.

My advice to you, is to just be as supportive as you can, until things settle a bit, and get back to normal.