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rajat91 · Jan 19, 2012, 01:04 AM

I love my ex a lot. I know she also love me the same way, but she is not ready to be back in relationship. She say we are friends and will remain friends. I tried so much to get her back. I love her madly, and I know she still feels for me. Please help me out what to do? I really can't think my life without her.

talaniman · Jan 19, 2012, 07:08 AM

When you get dumped, you disappear, leave them alone, and give yourself time to get yourself under control, and heal, so you can accept, and deal with reality. Then you can THINK about being friends. Right now, the heart is wounded, to wounded to think straight about anything.

Sorry, break ups hurt like hell, but it gets better if we keep our dignity, and self respect. Don't be a fool for love. Then you learn the hard way.

Jake2008 · Jan 20, 2012, 07:25 AM

I agree with Tal.

The end of a relationship is just that. The End. There is nothing left of the relationship, it is over.

It is sometimes possible to become friends, or remain friendly (for the sake of children for example), but without obligations or shared custody etc. to go from being in a relationship, to suddenly being friends, is not always possible.

Your need to be back in a relationship with her, is not the same as being in a relationship. Her need to remain a friend only, directly contradicts your needs.

My advice to you is to first, see the relationship you had, as over. Move ahead with your life without her, and get back into establishing yourself with your circle of friends, and meet new people. Try to start seeing yourself as single, and learn to rely on only yourself, without a significant other.

It takes time to recover from any relationship, and until you sever ties, and feel strong and independent without her, you are thwarting any other possibilities, that may just turn out to be better than what you had.

Good luck.

PunkkBarbiee · Jan 20, 2012, 09:59 AM

Hmm, I'm sorry for you're break up. But don't freak out too much over it; a breakup is a normal part of life, we all go through it. Maybe your ex just needs time to figure out who she is and if she is happy with her life right now. And when people do that, they often exclude other people --including their loved ones. If you think that she still has feelings for you, she will come back on her own time. Don't pressure her into coming back to you because that will make her doubt it even more. So continue being her friend and being her support. Don't let one failed relationship ruin a lifetime friendship. If you really love her, let her go. If she really loves you, she'll come back on her own time.

Xoxo.
PunkkBarbiee.

rashtok · Jan 23, 2012, 12:58 AM

You should give her space if she loves you as she says she won't handle being alone without you in her life as a partner, I do not really believe about friendships after being a boyfriend it seems so safe having you in her life feeling emotions being fulfilled but not committed so you need to know by being away for a while or at lease give her the space where she feels how s it when your absent.