[shonna1]

I am deeply in love with a guy, and he loves me too, and we want to get married, but the main issue is caste, as he as lower in caste than me. We are well educated, he is financially very sound, but I'm a middle class girl, and we both agree on the point that we won't marry without our parents consent. We both fear that our parents might reject our proposal for marriage, so we are worried how to convince our parents.

If anyone can suggest some way in this respect.

[Cat1864]

Shonna, on questions such as these, I always have to ask if you have discussed what a future marriage would entail. Do you both share the same expectations of married life and raising children? Have you discussed differences in traditions and how to compromise when they conflict?

Having the answers to those questions can prepare you to be able to discuss your wanting to marry with your parents. The information you have the more you can be prepared to counter their fears and arguments. For some parents it can show that you are actually thinking things through and not reacting to hormones.

Do you know your parents' views on love matches and intercaste marriages? Have they been looking for a husband for you? If they were arranging your marriage, would they find him an acceptable choice? Is there someone who might be willing to talk to your parents on your behalf?

Have your parents met him? Do they know you have been seeing him? If not, introducing them to each other may be a place to start.