[savours62]

I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 4 yrs and for the last 3 months, it has surfaced that he isn't happy with hislife- we got together just before uni, stayed together through uni and now re both working. Before then, he didn't hook up with other girls and now he feels he doesn't want to feel trapped with one in case he regrets it but doesn't want to cheat either. He doesn't want to close the door on me, we are great sources of support for each other, because in case he can't sleep around at least he knows he hs me as back up. I know this is a transitional part of his life, and he isusing me as support through it- I love him to bits, I want back in his head though I know he has to do this for himself.

Help, I don't know what to do. Accept him to want me but free to see other people? (at least I know his intentions so it isn't cheating that he has to feel bad about) and this way I still have him even if the relationship dissolves. He still kisses and hugs me, because he wants to and because I am his friend. He wants to be friends, loves me, but doesn't wantto end 'us' (eventhogh now, he doesn't do labels).

[slapshot_oi]

First, don't be anyone's plan b.

At this point, you ought to let him go, even if he changes his mind and wants to be with you. He's already stated his true intentions and he needs time alone.

Also, don't "be friends", it never works. It will prevent you from moving on and will cause tremendous pain.

He ain't a bad guy, props to him for the honesty, but let him do his thing, alone.

[talaniman]

Are you crazy or something? Tell him he is in it to win it, and its cheating if he messes around and then he is out of here!

You allow that dumb BS, you will get more of it, so expect better of yourself, and HIM!!

[susangpyp]

You need to be number one or none at all. Tell him that you are not willing to be friends or anything else. You have to value yourself enough to refuse this second rate treatment.