[dave118]

Hello 3 months ago my wife told me that it's over for good, because she's not attracted to me anymore, but wants to remain friends. We were together for 8 years, and have 2 little kids together, married for 2yrs.

She wants me to move on, and start dating, as that is what she is doing now. She said if our relationship was based on looks, then it wouldn't be a problem, but she wants more from a relationship.

She knows I love her to bits, and she love's me, but not in that way, not in love. We're spending Xmas together at her moms house, I don't want to let her go.

[talaniman]

She is already gone guy and you have to wrap your head around that fact.

Sorry but I don't think you have many choices here, and maybe dating is not something you are ready for, makings some adjustments is what you need to do, so you can accept what has happened. A life with friends, family, and activities should help, and putting you best foot forward for the holiday is crucial. IF you chose to go with her to her families home. I doubt I would be up for that at this time, so do they know what's going on?

Sorry for your loss. It will take time.

[dave118]

Yea they know what's going on her mom and sister have said to us split up... she has changed so much... what if we stayed friends do you think that maybe there will be a chance that we could start again from scratch

[pahlp]

You need to take care of yourself. I agree with Tal... you have to move on as this is over. Having false hope slows up recovery more than any other issue. You are in for a world of hurt if you keep trying to get her back. You can't get anyone back... they have to want to come back. After 8 years together don't try the I've changed honey... she won't believe it, it would take a lot for that to happen. Pick some things that you know will improve your life. Become a better person for yourself, if she decides to come back so be it, you might not want her back then. Good luck

[talaniman]

Be friends for your kids, but not for stepping into the lions den at her families house with everyone, even HER, against YOU.

Start from scratch?? I don't think so, not for romance at least, and the love is GONE!

She wants me to move on, and start dating, as that is what she is doing now.

Its not uncommon for ex partners to be better friends, better parents, after they split. That's a more reasonable goal than getting her love back.

[vanheart]

Nope, she's done. Isn't going to happen.

And when someone dumps you after 8 years. You have to take a step back.
Its going to take time. Lots. To recover.

Now concentrate on you & your kids. Screw her. She doesn't want you anymore.

Make sure that you & your kids are happy.

That's what's really important now. Make a plan for that.