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lichab · Dec 8, 2011, 01:35 PM

Past 2 weeks, my girlfriend went back to her hometown. There she found a guy who is doctor. He deeply falls in love with her. My girlfriend admits that she has some thoughts about that guy but she still loves me. I am 22 years old and she is 25. The new guys is older than her. He has a job and good income. I just finished my University and still looking for a job. Another thing to mention is that I am fat. But she said she is still on my side and want me to lose weight and get a job asap. I think she still loves me but things can be changed immediately. How can I make her to stay on my side and not thinking about that guy again?

P.S We are in love for 4 years now.

geminichick · Dec 8, 2011, 05:51 PM

You can't make her do anything she doesn't want to do. Have you ever heard the saying; "YOu can't have your cake and eat it too!"? She can't love you and devolop feelings for him at the same time. Does this girl make you feel like you need to change. YOu need to loose weight, do it for you, not for her or anybody, unless a doctor tells you because of a serious medical issue. Accept and love you for who you are. If she loved you she would realize that you are trying the best you can. It can be very difficult when you are finished your schooling to get a job in your chosen profession.

talaniman · Dec 8, 2011, 08:05 PM

Dude, don't worry about the competition, NEVER, because she is still with you right?

Fr_Chuck · Dec 8, 2011, 08:37 PM

There is always or could always be "another guy". If all that is of interest is money and looks, sorry there is always someone better looking or with more money, or both. And a person who is only interested in those are shallow and really you don't need those types anyway.

You don't do anything, since if they are really in love with you, nothing else matters.

lichab · Dec 9, 2011, 03:30 AM

Dear Geminichick,
Thanks for your opinion. I am now trying my best to lose weight. I hope the things I am doing now are not too late.

geminichick · Dec 9, 2011, 08:05 AM

You are trying your best to loose weight? For who? YOu or her? If you are doing it for her it is all for the wrong reason. If your doing it for you, because you want to feel better and be healthy, that's what's right! If this girl loved you she would accept you. WHat if you lost the weight and she still didn't want to be with you? What then? YOu've lost your dignity and self-respect.

NEVER, EVER do anything to impress someone else, to keep them. Otherwise, you will spend your whole life doing that. Doing things for them and not you! YOu deserve someone way better than her. She doesn't love or respect you for you. That is where my concern lies. YOu are sacrificing your happiness in life for someone that doesn't give a **** about you. There are a lot of women out there that will fulfill you as a man and the respect you deserve! Leave her in the past and move on with your future. It is hard for you to hear and I may seem a little harsh at the moment but I really need you to think about what you are doing to yourself! Please think about it! Take care of yourself!