[beachbunny88]

My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 months, we were acquaintances (had the same circle of friends) for years before we started dating. He's always had the reputation as being the funny guy, he tells a good story, has many friends, he's very charming/charismatic, and people seem to really like him.

We had an awesome relationship up until about a month ago. I went back to his place to go to bed, while he stayed out later with some friends, and I got on his laptop to check my Facebook. His came up, and I couldn't help but glance at his messages. He had been talking to a girl that lives in a different state for about a month, maybe longer. He would say things like "you're so beautiful, I can't stop thinking about you, etc." It really hurt my feelings, but what confuses me is that throughout all the messages, he made sure she knew he had a girlfriend and made sure she knew he wasn't willing to break up with me.

I completely ignored him for a week, and finally went over there to "talk". He broke down in tears, hugging me and saying that he had been depressed and just needed someone to talk to, and doesn't know why he didn't come to me instead. We're now back together, and things seem picture perfect. For the past two weeks, he's really gotten his act together, joining the military to make a better life for us, he always mentions marriage and having kids someday. He comes to see me whenever he can (we live an hour away from each other), always texts just to say he loves me, brings me my favorite food, etc. Things between us have never been better.

I asked him if he hooked up with anybody while we broke up and he said no, but then I later found out he had slept with his neighbor, this girl that we always kind made fun of. I don't want to bring it up because things have been so good between us, and he's been dealing with a lot of things recently, I almost feel like the relationship we have is the only thing that makes him happy right now, it seems like he's always super stressed and always leaning on me for support. I just don't want to stress him out anymore but I'm feeling really insecure about our relationship.

This is kind of scrambled, but if anyone could give me some advice it would be appreciated, ask any questions if you need more info.

[talaniman]

You have certainly squeezed a lot into 6 months, and I think though you have known him socially a long time, as a partner there is a lot more to learn. Maybe being so familiar has made you overly trusting or comfortable, but its obvious he has a lot he hasn't told you, and you have a lot of questions you should be asking.

Do so, as no relationship can be healthy without complete honesty as a foundation, and nothing can be built on secrets.

Start talking.

[amicon]

Where is the honesty?

He lied to you,I suggest you talk to him about that-plus a number of other things.

You can't carry the relationship-it needs to be a fifty/fifty thing.

''Things have never been better'',hmmm...

But are you feeling good?

I wouldn't.

[geminichick]

It sounds like your protecting him and his mental well-being. What about your own? What about how you feel and your well-being? You need to talk to him. I mean a real open heartfelt conversation with him and about what you know. There is information he is hiding from you. A successful relaitonship is based on communication and HONESTY!